Reinventing The Daemon

096: My Top 10 Albums For 2011

2011-12-30T16:33:00.004+08:00

Picking only 10 albums sucks, because there are too many great albums out there. It's tough, but I manage to choose 10 that I really dig. Here goes:

LMFAO - Sorry For Party Rocking

Yellowcard - When You're Through Thinking, Say Yes

The Get Up Kids - There Are Rules

Protest The Hero - Scurrilous

Rise Against - Endgame

Florence and the Machine - Ceremonials

Mastodon - The Hunter

Times of Grace - The Hymn of a Broken Man

Death Cab for Cutie - Codes and Keys

August Burns Red - Leveler

The following are worth mentioning:

Arch Enemy - Khaos Legions

Mogwai - Hardcore Will Never Die, But You Will

Funeral for a Friend - Welcome Home Armageddon

095: Not Just Another Day

2011-06-21T23:18:00.006+08:00

It was a wonderful day, cooling and windy, but nonetheless, wonderful, without any hint of rain. You and yours friends or loved ones were spending some precious moment together. It was great to finally get some free time to relax after countless days of keeping up with schedule, running around to meet deadline, and all those boring stuff you did at work.

You were probably hanging out with your friends at a cafe, having a sip of coffee and savoring those sinful but divine cheesecake that was topped with some chocolate sauce and a half-sliced piece of strawberry. When the cake entered your mouth and landed on the tip of your tongue, you thought, "ooohhh, this is life". Great ambience, awesome friends, mouthwatering desserts, what else can you ask for?

The day was going great for awhile, but something was diverting your attention. At the far corner of your eye, you noticed a van. You turned to take a glimpse at it, because it was hauntingly beautiful. A van with transparent glasses, where you can see the content of the vehicle. Flowers were arranged around a big box, and you thought it belongs to a florist. Then you realized that the box was actually... a coffin.

That's when you were reminded that life is short. Too short that it will not even last a hundred years (unless you're one of those few lucky (or cursed) ones). You were reminded repeatedly about your mortality. Some days you just shrugged it off, and some days you reflect on your life. Today is not the day that you just sweep it under the rug. "What have I done so far in my life? Is this what I want? Have I achieved my dreams? Will I be remembered when I die?". Probably others will ask, "What will happen to my Facebook account? Will they post condolences on my wall? Who will manage my account to add old friends that I did not manage to accept? Will my blog be a relic for people to remember me by?".

This is cliche, but you never know when you will die. You wondered if you have fulfilled your dreams and responsibilities. Will it even matter? You're dead, and you only need to worry about what happen after your death. Will you become a ghost? Will you be facing God? Will you be in heaven or hell? Will your soul be transferred to another universe or dimension? Will you even realize that you're dead?

But do we even want to mull over it? It does gives me the chills. I don't want to die. I want to be immortal and still look like I'm 21. Wistful thinking, but I hope it will happen. If I'm still going to die, at least create the cure to growing older, please?

094: No Revolution

2011-05-22T21:10:00.004+08:00

It's kind of overdue to write about this now, and I have so many things to say. But I'll make it short.

I was, and still, frustrated with the General Elections results. What the hell man? Why are you people afraid to vote for another? Why do you still believe that your vote is not secret? Why listen to hearsay? Those pakcik/apek/mamak from coffeeshop got PhD is it? Why so fucking stupid?! I believe the people who voted for the ruling party were old retarded fucks. Of course they don't care, they are going to die soon!

2016? No hope lah. You people are fucked already. Not the kind of fuck that you guys get from your spouse/gf/bf, etc, but the kind of fuck that you get from foreign trash that raped you from the back (read: assfuck).

I really need to get out of this forsaken country...

Note: No offence to my foreign friends. If you're in my list, then you're good. :-D

093: London Calling

2011-03-16T16:55:00.004+08:00

So here I am in London... It's almost 9 A.M. here, and I need to shower. It was cold last night when I arrived. Let's see if it's that cold during the day.

092: WTF Blogger / Multiply??!!

2011-03-03T00:03:00.003+08:00

This is definately stupid. You see, I linked up my Blogspot and Multiply together, so that everytime I post something in Blogger, Multiply will import it. It worked well so far, no complaints. But I did not expect it to import posts from my 2nd blog too!

What was the 2nd blog for? Let me explain. I had an assignment, and I must create a blog for it. I gotta write over the course of a few weeks, before submitting the link to my lecturer. It's all done now. But today, I logged in to Multiply (hell, I have not been logging in for a long time!) And suddenly, I saw all the post for that blog in my Multiply page! Oh, the horror!!! I'm never going to use my personal account for assignments again!

Anyway, I have not been blogging for months! I have nothing to share now, because I'm drained. It's been tiring, I need a holiday..

Wait, I AM going for a holiday in two weeks! Woohoooo!!!!!

091: Another New Beginning

2011-01-01T02:56:00.000+08:00

2010 was a great year. Well, it may not be all smooth sailing, but it was an enriching year.

Earlier this year (or should I say last year), I was optimistic about what the year will bring me. I was close with a woman whom I fell for, spent most of the time together, stayed over her place and have quality time with her. We kinda shared many things in common.

Two weeks after my birthday, she decided to severe all ties, and I was lost. I was kind of depressed, and kept thinking about how to amend things. But it was really the end, and there was nothing I could do to prevent it.

Every dark clouds have a silver lining though. A couple of month after that, I was offered a new job. If she was still around, I would not have survived in this new company. You see, when you start on a new job, you need full concentration and no distraction. She used to call me every few hours, and that would have distracted me. So I left the company that I have been with for three years, where I did not received any salary increment or bonus. It was stupidity on my part for staying that long.

The new job was not merciful. It was chaotic, messy, and.. stressful? But I liked it. All my previous jobs were too easy for me, to the extend of insulting my intelligence. I have more responsibilities in that new job. The slightest mistake will cause the whole office to panic and start thinking of ways to resolve the issues. We ended up doing overtime, and getting back home late. Not helping either when you were preparing for your graduation project. I did finish my project though, and when the day for the presentation came, I was prepared. I even got an ‘A’ for it. It’s either I was lucky, or I’m really that damn smart.

Despite the piling workload, I was still prepared to further my education. A few months after getting my results, I registered for a Bachelor’s degree. Who would have thought that I would be doing a degree? I shouldn’t be gloating though. I’m just in the second term now, and there are still so much to do. Not forgetting that I have four assignments due soon, and I have yet to get started.

Back to the new job. It was good. Better salary. I even received a bonus! I’m still finding another job though. I need to do something I like. I studied mass communications for a reason. I want a job related to my field of study. I have to believe that I can get it this year.

2010 have been good to me. I need to believe that 2011 will be much better. Need. I will dispel any negativity and believe. Faith is all I have now.

These are the two words that I need to hold on to: Faith and Believe.

090: The progress so far...

2010-11-29T22:52:00.005+08:00

I have just finished my first term for my Bachelor. The assignments were mind-blowing. You see, for two of the assignments, I have to read some articles and make some references to Aristotle, and his three rhetorical approach to convince and persuade people. The articles given were interesting, something that I would definately read. But to analyze and write a critique on it? Woah...

I failed miserably. I'm not referring to the grades. I passed five of the six assignments (I'm still waiting for the result of the last assignment to be released) mind you. I got one Distinction and four Credits, which sucks actually, because I should have worked harder and get all distinction for the assignments. But you know me, always waiting till deadlines to start on those assignments. I cannot believe that I'm still fooling around even at degree level.

Now back to my failure. For one of the assignments, I decided to work on a piece of article regarding former U.S President Bush. It was quite a long piece, with two A4 size pages of text with fonts of 10. I spent a week analyzing that article, but still couldn't grasp the whole purpose of the writer for that article. I gave up eventually, and focussed on an article by a prisoner of war who uses emotional appeals and abstraction to persuade the audience to disagree with an agreement between his country and Japan (due to the WWII apocalypse). It was easier, but I only received a Credit for it! Humph!!

There's a couple of other failures as well, but let's not elaborate further. For now, I'll just wait for the last assignment's result and be prepared for the start of a new term this Friday.

P/S: Have you seen my new hair? :-P

089: blank

2010-11-08T01:33:00.002+08:00

I was reading through my previous entries in this blog (not the old one). And I find the older entries interesting (self-praising mode activated). Now, I don't know how to construct an interesting entry.

What is wrong with me?!

Dear creativity, please hit me...

088: A Different Direction

2010-08-29T18:12:00.003+08:00

I'm not sure if I have made the right decision, but hell, I've made it, and I need to make the best of it. I scrapped the plan to continue with my Advance Dip. I left that school (half-heartedly), to start on a new journey.

I'll be taking my Bachelor of Arts instead! You have to admit, Adv Dip is bullshit. I don't understand why a university whose ranking is not that great have strict requirements. I am enrolled in a much better Uni now (and definately harder), so it's time to buck up and stop fooling around (okay, I won't stop, but let's not make that often).

Orientation last Tuesday was rather... entertaining. Let's see if there is more entertainment to come (I doubt so, but let's just hope). My only gripe is that the CD-Rom that was given by the Uni won't work with my awesome Macbook Pro!!! Argghhh!!!!

Maybe it's time to install Windows on my Mac. I'll just allocate a small space for it (1 GB can?).

Looks like I'll be friends again with Windows (just friends, coz I'm married to Mac).

If only they have a Mac Edition for me...

087: A Stranger In An Island

2010-07-20T01:30:00.002+08:00

I no longer feel at home. The faith I had diminishes with each passing day. There is no pride in being here. I am constantly being stepped upon by people who are supposed to be the strangers.

We are no longer the pride of the establishment. Just take a look at our surroundings. The filthy rich and the pathetically poor, establishmentarian vs. disestablishmentarian, the blind patriotic vs. the 'anarchist', heavy censorship vs. free speech, and the list goes on and on. The former are triumphant, no matter how big their size are. We are blinded by the propaganda machines that present itself in the form of media.

People demand change. No, there will be no change. We are comfortable with the current situation. We know the truth, but prefer lies. Lies are simple. Simple is bliss. We admit defeat, and live in decline. Change is farfetched. I know it. You know it. We know it.

There will be no change. Stop hoping. Stop believing. It's time to leave. I desperately need to leave. They remove the 'pro' in progress and add an 'ag' and an 'ion' in it.

I want to leave.. Any kind soul willing to spare me $300,000? No, I won't pay back. :-D

086: Goodbye (This time, it's for good)

2010-06-17T23:10:00.005+08:00

Dear Windows,

I know it's hard for you to accept the fact that you're no longer good enough for me. How can I be happy with crashes, viruses, and 1000 more things that you cannot stay away from? We have been together for more than 10 years. Fuck, I've spent half of my life with you!!!

This time, I'm really leaving you. Sure, you tried to make it up by releasing Windows 7. But you can never satisfy my lust for speed, efficiency, and 1000 other things that you can't provide for.

I'll never forget about you though. How can I? I go to work everyday, and I have to face YOU!!! We may not be in a relationship anymore, but we are still colleagues. And you will be one of those people that I hate at work (you just freezes on me earlier today at work, and I have not fucking saved my documents!).

I'll never forget the times we had together though. We have gone through thick and thin together. From those enormous floppy disk to the smaller ones (now, they are extinct). CD writer to USB memory sticks. Windows - Windows 95 - Windows 98 - Windows ME: Millennium Edition (call it Mistake Edition) - Windows XP - Windows Vista - and now, Windows 7. And of course, our journey to more than a million websites over the years.

Let's not reminisce over these bitter sweet memories. It's over now. I've found more than just viruses, slow loading, and crashes. She is definately much more better than you, and she will be mine forever (or maybe until something better comes out. Hey, I'm a guy! Deal with it!).

Goodbye. I'll miss you... NOT!

Yours sincerely,
Iqbal 'DaemonChylde' Mohamed

085: Moving On

2010-05-19T01:39:00.003+08:00

Confessing the bad things I have done, I am not doing it for you. But for me. Only me. My reflections. So, no, your forgiveness you said you won't ever give is not required

I'm learning to let go, even though your shadow is still lingering. I'm still wondering whether you were my sweetest dream, or my nightmare.

If we meet again, I hope we have already achieve our dreams. The dreams that we have revealed when we spend hours daily on the telephone. The dreams that we discussed every time we met. The dreams that we shared when we slept together. Dreams that were not built on sand.

We may meet again.. But will it be for good? Or are we destined to stay apart? Will reconciliation benefit the both of us? Or will it destroy the dreams that we have built?

Will we ever find out?

084: Iqbal - Part II

2010-05-01T02:24:00.002+08:00

I can still tolerate Eee-bhan or Eee-bhal. But not Eeem-mwaa, Imran (wtf?), Akba, Iqmal (if you can pronounce this, then I don't understand how you can't pronounce 'Iqbal'), Eee-ma, and Shiva (yes!! I'm not kidding!! I've become a Hindu god!)

Children, let me teach you how to pronounce 'Iqbal' slowly...

Eeeeeeekkkk....... bhaaaaaalllll......

083: The Singapore Dream

2010-04-21T21:36:00.005+08:00

Most of us are definately chasing after those 5 Cs: Cash, Car, Condominium, Credit Cards, and Country Clubs. I am one of them. So far, it's two down, two to go (I'm not into country clubs). But I don't think I will ever be contented with what I have. I wouldn't be happy with a million bucks, a Mitsubishi Evo, and a condo at Bedok Reservoir. Any Dick, Joe, or Harry can afford that! I want more.

A few hundred millions or billions, with a Lamborghini, and a mansion (or maybe a penthouse will do) in the heart of the city. And of course, some power.

That's what I call a dream, and I am willing to sell my soul for them.

I will. I swear.

082: Weird

2010-04-13T00:20:00.000+08:00

How weird can someone or something be?

Just when I thought I have seen everything...

081: Cigarettes & Red Bull - The Final War (For This Certification)

2010-04-04T20:02:00.002+08:00

Nope, not really the end. I still want to continue with a higher certification. But with a new job that might 'stop' me from continuing, there might be a.... Wait, what the fuck? No no no!! I won't let this happen. I will work for a few months, and then try to negotiate with the person in charge. Lessons are twice a week, so I believe they can accommodate the schedule. Can't be doing overtime every day right?

Anyway, this coming exams will be a heavy one. I really mean it. HEAVY! The dynamic of Mass Communications will be tough to handle. But there is something else. A topic that I need to digest for this Tuesday exam.

Religion.

I have to write about one probably. And I don't know which one to choose. I'm contemplating between (in alphabetical order) Christianity, Hinduism, and Islam (I don't know anything about Buddhism, sorry).

Christianity: The bible, history & culture, philosophy, Trinity.
Hinduism: The 2 epic books (Mahabharata & Ramayana), the different Gods, history & culture.
Islam: The Qur'an, Hadith Nabi, Tasawuf.

*sigh* Religions are hard to fathom. Since I really can't decide, then there is only one thing left to do...

*eeny meeny miney mo...*

080: Mathidiot

2010-03-30T01:31:00.003+08:00

Am I getting dumber, or the primary school mathematics syllabus are getting (ridiculously) harder? Some of them I don't even understand!!! I left all my mathematics knowledge in secondary school (I was never good at it anyway).

And all of the questions require the students to do some 'working'.

"Angela have $20. After spending $3.40 on cocaine and $2.60 on liquor, she found another 50% of what she's left with on the floor. How much money does she have now?"

Me: Oh, it's $21.
Sis: I want the working!!
Me: What working?

The module on Economics that I've done in my current school is not helping at all (all I remembered was equilibrium ^@!$&$ supply and demand of ai ya ya ya elasticity of blah blah blah marginal walauwey diminishing returns what the f&$# opportunity cost hell yeah!)

Somebody shoot me in the head please.

079: Light In This Darkened World

2010-03-22T00:28:00.004+08:00

I knew I was not ready for it. But when the time comes where I am fully prepared, will I get the same "opportunity"?
Or something better will come? Or worse, none at all?

How do people dispel negativity? Am I attracting all the bad energy because of my negativity?

Do I need someone/something to be my light; or should I be the light, in this darkened world?

078: Pleasure & Sorrow

2010-03-12T02:13:00.002+08:00

I walked a mile with Pleasure;
She chatted all the way;
But left me none the wiser
For all she had to say.

I walked a mile with Sorrow,
And ne'er a word said she;
But, oh! The things I learned from her,
When Sorrow walked with me.

Robert Browning Hamilton
(From 'Have a Little Faith' by Mitch Albom)

077: Time.. Flies!

2010-03-10T00:15:00.002+08:00

I will be finishing my current course soon. Exams in 3-4 weeks, followed by a Graduation Project, to be handed in May. I will definately continue with my Advance Dip. Still deciding whether to start immediately (August intake), or take a break and join the November intake. But time flies so fast. I believe many people asked why. Here's my theory:

Many of us keep demanding that the weekends come soon. And not only on Mondays, but on any other weekdays. Imagine the number of people who keep begging for weekends to come soon.

Heard of the term "mind over matters"? It's true. The mind is a powerful force. And how many people are thinking of the same thing (for the weekends to come fast)? Millions. The universe received these signals from their minds, and therefore, made it happen. So stop wishing for the weekends to come, and embrace every single day. (Note: I don't practice what I preach here)

Wait, do you guys understand what I'm trying to say?

076: Tweet

2010-02-24T20:53:00.002+08:00

aaronissocool: ah lians are hot...

DaemonChylde: @aaronissocool She is hotter...

aaronissocool: @DaemonChylde other fish in the sea dammit, OTHER FISH IN THE SEA!

DaemonChylde: @aaronissocool I still want that fish. She makes me whole..

aaronissocool: @DaemonChylde stop saying shit like that, i swear to god i'll pop u... now be quiet & quit rockin the boat.

075: Farewell

2010-02-19T21:55:00.002+08:00

It's strange how a little argument can lead to the severance of friendship. You said there are other factors that made you think about cutting ties with me, and that argument triggered it. I'm still clueless about the other factors.

Yes, I was being an ass. I was insensitive towards your feelings. But was it THAT bad? I believe your perspective of me have changed now. I know there is a lot of negative feelings about me in your head now, and you will never stop hating me.

Can we start over? How I wish I could go back in time and retract what I've said. But meta-physicians have yet to create time machines, and even if they did, it will be inaccessible to any of us.

I love you, but you will never know (because you don't read my blog). If you read this, you would probably laugh at my.. weakness.

I hope we can be friends again. I miss hanging out with you. I miss chatting with you. I miss listening to your rants about stuffs. I miss seeing/hearing you getting angry at people or situation. I miss everything about you.

I can only hope... Boy, this is hopeless.

074: Detach

2010-01-14T23:49:00.002+08:00

First of all, do this Johari Window of me: http://kevan.org/johari?name=Iqbal99 .

Oh, exams over (for now). So I can start on my Dan Brown (The Lost Symbol) and Mitch Albom (Have A Little Faith) now. I think it's best that I start reading them soon, so I can stop thinking about... stuff. It's already definite that I don't qualify for 'entry'. But I'm still.. grieving, and my sorrow is so great, that it disable my ability to draw a line.

My friend said, "I don't want to say this, but: I've told you so. Do you regret now?" I have no answer to that. "Everything happen for a reason, and I hope it will make you stronger, and make a better choice next time".

The problem with me is that I won't settle for anything less. Let's say the thing that I want now is a Lexus. If I don't get it now, then my expectations will be higher. I will only settle for a Ferrari next. "You need to tone down your expectations" she further advised. Fuck, took me years to find it (well, I didn't find it.. It just.. came).

My 40 minutes chat with her was not.. soothing. I was still feeling like shit. Even now. But thank you for being there and trying to give me some comfort.

It would probably be a good idea to detach myself from all forms of communication (just for a few days or a week). My cell is already switched off, and after this post, I will disconnect myself from the byte highway. "Because of *********************? The 'problem' will still be there"

I just need to be alone for awhile. It may not be a gratifying solution, but better than not trying. Right?

I wish I could take sabbatical leaves, and hibernate for a few months at home. No communications, no going out (even to the 7-Eleven), no nothing. Just lying on my bed, read some books and newspaper.

Maybe I will make it happen.

073: Cigarettes & Red Bull: Understanding Human, Race, and Religion. Through Mass Communications?

2010-01-03T23:55:00.004+08:00

My brain is still pounding from whatever things that happened for the past few weeks, thus disabling my concentrations on the revisions for tomorrow's exam (or rather, later in the afternoon). If I get a penny for every confusion I've had for the past weeks, hell, I could buy an island! (Okay, that's exaggerating)

I get mixed reactions from the people I know. One was surprised (and she calls me stupid), one was baffled, but supportive.

Maybe I can attribute some psychological explanation to their reactions (why not? I'm supposed to be revising now, and probably this will help me get a better understanding of the subject). The surprised one was having this perception that I won't be foolish enough to be wanting it, and wondered what made me wants it. Her assumptions of the thing was all negative, and she was not supportive, but rather, waiting for the 'demise' of my need (or should I say want?). The supportive one was practicing cognitive dissonance. He probably thought that it was a bad idea, but, he still supported me. (Okay, I don't think this will help me for exams, :-P )

It doesn't matter what they think. I'm certain that I have found what I was looking for. Sadly, I'm also convinced that I won't get it. This is probably a once in a lifetime thing. And now, it seems that I won't be getting it no matter how hard I tried.

Damn, I hate myself now. Why must I be different?

072: My 50 Albums of the Decade

2009-12-29T22:07:00.010+08:00

Click the above image to see all 50 albums!!!

The past 10 years have been great for music fans. We are fed with sounds filled with ecstasy that kept us hooked to our discman (early 2000) and mp3 players (2004 onwards). I believe the music from the past 10 years have shaped those who are in their twenties now. From rock to metal, hip-hop to pop, you name it. You could be consciously or unconsciously influenced by them. I know they have changed me. In a big way.

When we were younger, we have been exposed to only famous artists like Michael Jackson, The Cranberries, New Kids On The Block, Bon Jovi, Backstreet Boys, etc. Too much mainstream is definately bad for our soul. We will get so used to the same thing over and over again until our system can't accept music that are different from the 'norms'.

In our teenage years, we wanted to be different, and began to look out for new music that can relate to us. We dig the underground through the Internet for something different. Something unique. Something that says "we" in their songs. And we found it. I found it. And the rest... is history.

There are hundreds of albums (or even thousands) that I have listened to. Choosing 50 albums was tough. But I pulled through. :-)

071: Butterflies (In My Stomach)

2009-12-19T19:12:00.004+08:00

Okay, I need opinions!

Based on my rants in this blog, do you think my writings are good? Do I have a strong or moderate command of English? And most importantly, can I write?

Answer A.S.A.P.!!!

Anyway, other blogs have pictures and stuff to tell readers about their whereabouts and all. Why don't I? I keep forgetting that I have a blog to 'showcase' all. Hahahax!!! Last week trip to the arts museum was great. Now, I want to go to the National Museum (there are having some Egyptian stuff and mummies going on). Oh, and here pics from last week. More in Facebook. :-)

070: Self Censorship

2009-12-15T00:04:00.002+08:00

I had typed out a long entry for this post, but decided to delete them all. Mainly because:

I'm confused
I'm not sure if it's me who's talking
I don't want to offend anyone
It's hypocritical (sort of)
I don't want people to start debating with me
This is a topic that have no conclusion
This is one of the four things that you cannot argue about: religion, race, music, politics

So I typed another entry. And again, I delete them all. This time round, it's because:

It's too personal (I need to let it out though)
It will strain friendship and ties will be severed
It will cause awkwardness
It may show my weakness

So... What the hell should I write on? Oh, I know! Maybe I can tell you what I ate for dinner?
Boring...
(Chicken curry with rice by the way :-P )

069: Presenting = Hell

2009-12-08T19:39:00.002+08:00

I suck when it comes to presentations. I'm still a shy boy (wahahahahahahhax!!!). Maybe because I only know half of the people in there. I was shivering and mumbling like a train (yeah, fast mumbling.

This is what I've said, DIFFERENT from what I was PLANNING to say:

"Hey.. New artists have been covering songs from previous gene.. I mean, artists .. bands from the previous generation, as they are still relevant in this age, err... New generation... Kids in this new generation don't want to listen to the previous bands, because they think it's bullshit. For example, The Offspring... from California, covered the song Blitzkrieg Bop, originally by the Ramones. The song is about the German World War II.. in 1964 or something? (Shit, since when I failed history!) Also, heavy metal band Megadeth, covered Anarchy In The U.K. by the Sex Pistols, as they want to reach out to metal listeners... or fan or whatever, about the political situation, and still relevant (okay, it's not that relevant). Even Bob Dylan's song have been covered for the Live Nation concert, as his song is relevant to the thing.. Global climate... Global warming or something.. Now, I'm going to pass it to..."

Epic fail.

068: Confused State of a Metal/Punk Kid

2009-11-29T15:52:00.003+08:00

"I don't know why. I think I have high ego and low self esteem", I said.

"You're a confused guy."

Maybe I am. I don't know. I want something... big. I won't settle for anything less, because I don't want to be seen inferior. But I don't think I'll get that something, because I think I don't deserve it, or I'm not up to that level.

I want something, but refused to ask for it, as I don't want to be seen as desperate, and also, I don't think I'll get it.

I need that something, but I don't have the capital to initiate it, and it will be embarrassing if I showed that lack of resource, even if there are possibilities that I will get it. At the same time, I don't think I will get it, because I think I'd fail miserably.

This confusion has been around for quite some time (years even). I believe I could escape this madness if I have that one thing. But I'm unlikely to have it anytime soon, or worse, ever.

Discouraged. Heartbroken. Ravenous. Infuriated.

Faith? Can I spend it?

I'm starting to hate my life again.

067: Bored Upon Arrival

2009-11-22T15:33:00.005+08:00

The gig was managed by a bunch of idiots. I won't list down the number of screw ups they did before the gig, because that's not my problem. But as a ticket buying consumer, I'm going to COMPLAIN about the management during the gig.

First, they did not manage the time properly, or should I say manage the bands? The organiser was afraid to approach the bands performing on stage that their time was up. Pussy. Big fucking pussy.

Second, during the performance by WormRot. One of the crew wanted to tell the band that their time was up, but tried to scream from where I was standing. Of course they can't hear, stupid. And suddenly he was like, "Yelah, aku cakap tak nak dengar pe" (I wanna speak but you guys ignore me (something like that, I suck in translation)). You are supposed to go to the stage to tell them, douchebag. It's noisy, how to hear you out? You expect people to hear you every time you talked ah? Who are you man? Some high profile rock star?

Thirdly, they chopped off the time for the last two bands. I was waiting for Thy Fallen Kingdom (TFK) to performed. I headbanged my head off during their set. But, after playing three songs, the organiser told them to stop, because of time constraint. WHAT THE FUCK??!! What can't you just extend the time at the bar? So cheapskate ah? Fear of gaining little profit? Fuck you all!

One of the lousiest gig I went to. I could list down others stuff. But, I wanna go out now (HAHAHAHAX!!!).

066: Funny shit here.

2009-11-21T02:27:00.006+08:00

From Lamebook

065: Down With The Sickness (Probably)

2009-11-19T21:42:00.004+08:00

Image by death-by-pizza via deviantART

I think I'm going down with a flu. The peril of not bringing an umbrella to work. It suddenly rained while I was eating my lunch. It was hot for a moment, and suddenly, BAM!!! Heavy shower with some streaks of lighting. I had to walk in the rain to get back to my workplace.

But before that, I had a smoke (and hoping for the rain to stop, or at least 'calm down' a little). A lady was approaching, and suddenly asked, "Do you want an umbrella?" She was looking at me. I took out my earpiece and ask, "Whose umbrella?" And suddenly a man was right infront of me. They seems to be friends, and I think I made a fool of myself, thinking that she was talking to me. But I SWEAR, she was looking at me! What the fuck! Why look at me when you're talking to another person. God dammit! That must be the most embarrassing moment of the year! Stupid stupid stupid!!!

Anyway, I don't like carrying an umbrella (unless I'm in a suit or something, I would make the umbrella a cool accessory). If I do carry one, I'll make sure it's black, with no stupid logo of some financial institutions.

I usually get sick once a year. But this year, it's been twice (not including the upcoming one). Is this the sign of aging? Wait.. I'm not even 25! And my body have been aching since "I don't know when". Shit..

I need a massage, and I don't know where to get it. Asked some friends, and was told of some places. Just when I was about to thank them profusely for the information, they added, "If you want extra, $50". Fuck that shit. I want to go to a massage parlour that DON'T offer extras! Legitimate massage please!

My back... Oh, my back...

064: My Lawyer Made Me Change The Title of This Entry (So That I Wouldn't Get Sued)

2009-11-12T23:18:00.005+08:00

I'm going to complain more about "foreign talent". I never realized how this trend affect Singaporeans in a big way.

Until recently.

Now, foreigners not only hold those construction, cleaning, housekeeping (etc) jobs. In my office, there a few foreigners who can't speak English, yet, they are holding those desk bound position (jobs that many Singaporeans are looking for). One of them even gets citizenship after staying here for 4 years (he served NS by the way). And he is the only one who can speak English (very SLOWLY). The rest? The rest talked to me in their own language!!! How the fuck can I understand?

For housing, do you realized that Singaporeans are getting kicked out of their own house because they can't pay up their monthly mortgage? (Due to retrenchments, etc) Imagine, they have paid half of the mortgage, only for their house to be repossessed. Sure, foreigners can afford to buy a house here, because they have a JOB!

Don't tell me the history of our forefathers (who were foreigners). When they first came here, this little dot was NOTHING!!! They worked real hard, and made Singapore the way it is now. But the current immigrant? They are just enjoying the escape from their country here!

I'm not shifting the whole blame to these foreigners. The other half goes to the people who 'import' them here.

The future seems bleak for the original Singaporeans. I have made a vow, and that is to migrate if I can afford to (can you see the irony here?).

The mass communications field in the U.S. is wide, and I'm considering that option.

If "change" is coming, I refuse to believe in anything again.

063: Iqbal

2009-11-07T01:53:00.002+08:00

Let me teach you how to pronounce 'Iqbal'.

Say: "Eeeek-bhal". Not "Eee-bhan".

Understood?

062: D?

2009-11-03T19:19:00.002+08:00

The outcome was bad. I got a 'D' for Advertising!!! The paper was easy!!! How the fuck I get a 'D'??? I'm not the only one though. Others are getting lousy grades as well (there is only a single 'B' and no 'A's!). So appeal we must! My first 'D'! Damn it! There must be something wrong with the marker. 8 full pages of answers not enough for you ah?

Anyway, I find it weird that every time I took the train with Aaron, funny things happen.

We were discussing about our next assignment (another 2500 words of crap, a drop from 3000), which is any topic related to Communication. I decided to do 'Communication in Heavy Metal' (typical of me), and told Aaron about one aspect of Communication, which is non-verbal (or maybe hand sign), and start showing the horns and the middle finger. "Stop doing that, you're embarrassing me!". "You mean this?", raised my finger mid-way in the air.

A couple with their two kids were sitting in front of us. The two little girl started to follow, trying to make horns and putting up their finger (no prize for guessing which one), imitating me. Fuck!!! Raised my hand to apologize, and the mum was laughing, "Oh, it's okay. It's okay" Aaron: "See, baaaad influence!"

The girls were cute though... Especially the younger one. She kept looking at me after we alighted (they drop at the same station) and going down the escalator. Cute little creature I'm telling you.

Talking about assignment... I can't find anything on Heavy Metal and Communication!

Time to find another alternatives I guess.

061: Offline

2009-10-28T01:12:00.003+08:00

10 days of no access (my charger was spoilt) was not that bad after all. Well, massive boredom, but I survived. (Okay Mr. AC Adaptor, don't die on me again!)

060: Transitions vs. SunActive

2009-10-17T02:49:00.005+08:00

Yes, I'm talking about the spectacles lens. I made a new specs last week, and I'm extremely unhappy about it. Previously, I used the original Transitions, and loved it. It changed colour fast, and I don't have to squint my eyes because of the sun's glare. Comfortably dark. Sadly, it was broken, and I need a new pair.

So off I go to an optical shop at Bedok, trying to score a cheap Transitions. The store I went to said there is a local version, called SunActive, and it's half the price of Transitions (Transition: $160, Made In France, she said). I thought the local version would suit me better. Come on, it's local! You would probably think that the manufacturer would consider how hot and bright it is in this sunny yet gloomy island.

I was fucking wrong!

It did not turn as dark as I expected. My eyes... My eyes!!!!! Arghhhhh!!!!!

How do you expect people to support local product when you make sub-standard product?!

I feel cheated.

Moral of the story: Get the original Transitions, dammit!

059: 'Love Letter'

2009-10-10T22:44:00.002+08:00

Dear Ms. K*****,

I've been logging in to my blackboard since last week. However, the registration for my next term is still not available online.
This is not the first time that it happened. It is really time consuming for me to keep going to the Student Service Unit to register for my modules.

I am a progression student, and it is really frustrating to know that the new students are able to know the dateline for the module selection, and I was left in the dark. I hope this problem will be rectified, so that I don't have to go through the same ordeal next term.

I would appreciate it if you would help me to register for my modules. My particulars are as the following:

Name: Mohamed Iqbal Bin Mohamed
I/C: S85*****A
HP No.: 9814****
Modules chosen for next term: Human & Mass Communications (Mondays) and Social Behavioral Studies (Fridays).

There is a possibility that the modules that I have chosen are not on the day that I had expected it to be. If the timetable have been changed, please inform me.

Thank you.
Iqbal Mohamed

----------------------------------------------------------

WAKE UP LAH YOU PEOPLE!!!!!!

058: Cigarettes & Red Bull Part II: Journalistic War

2009-10-08T20:26:00.006+08:00

Photo by DeathAndDisinfectant via deviantART

Our captain didn't tell us what to expect. Well, maybe some hints (which doesn't help). All of us were nervous, and my cell kept ringing from calls and SMSes from worried soldiers who were preparing for the same war as me. "Which class?" "What have you studied?" "I think I will fail!" "Where are you?!" and many others. I promised to be early for the war, but I was late. "Thought you are going to reach at 3?" Yeah, I know...

Entered the war zone, and everybody looked up to me as I leave my "ammunition" at the front. All that faces.. Stressful look, trying to figure out what they were reading. With two black pens and driving license as my weapons (okay, the license was for identification purpose :-P ), I head to my desk with a card that showed the number '8' on it.

It's a silent war, and everybody was scrutinizing and attacking their foes.

Before you attack your enemy, you need to learn their moves and strategy. So I flipped the paper and study the first page. There was a speech written, about some racial harmony night by some minister. I read it slowly...

Now for the attack. Write a news report on the article, assuming that you had received the speech earlier before the event. Need to use the inverted pyramid method of writing news, meaning, the most important message at the top.

What the fuck...? ALL the messages seemed important.. I decided to wrote from the conclusion of the speech as the main message.

Been told that media manipulation will be attacking us. I think all of us expected that. As I move forward to the other adversaries, I saw no media manipulation. Wow... We were screwed! What confronted us were bloodthirsty proximity, prominence, preparation of radio programs, etc.

"You got 2 more hours" The old war veteran announced.

Gosh! I took one bloody hour to write a news report? What?!

Delayed no more time and start my attack on Cyber Journalism, Journalism Ethics, and TV News Package. Halfway through the news package, the war veteran "barked" again, "You got one more hour left".

I have never spent so much time in any silent war. This is the first. Raised up my hair after I've killed my opponents, and saw another soldier, Aaron, leaving the war zone.

Aaron was sitting outside when I exit from the zone. All I can say was: "WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?!"

Waited for the rest of the soldiers outside school. Everybody was shocked from the war. "What the hell is standupper?" "What question you took?" "We were screwed!"

I believe there will be some victory in 1-2 months (when the result slip came out), but still think we lost.

There will be more wars coming, and we will prepare for the worst the next time.

Oh, another war tomorrow! More cigarettes and red bull please!!!

057: Cigarettes & Red Bull

2009-10-05T23:42:00.004+08:00

Photo by ~zombiecup via deviantART

I'm preparing for my education war which will be happening later. Above are part of my preparation.

Journalism is a bitch afterall (or is it the lecturer?)

056: Omnipotent

2009-09-27T20:55:00.003+08:00

Photo by ~BrokenFayth via deviantART

I had an 'educational' dream. A guy asked me what omnipotent means. I was trying hard to find the meaning, and suddenly, saw a Marvel poster showing all the superheroes displaying their powers. I showed they guy that poster, and woke up.

Think I've heard of that word before, but never knew what it meant. I thought my dream was giving me the wrong meaning of the word (as in omnipotent is having great power). But the dictionary agrees with it:

–adjective

1.	almighty or infinite in power, as God.

2.	having very great or unlimited authority or power.

–noun

3.	an omnipotent being.

4.	the Omnipotent, God.

Wow... Wonders how does dreams work actually?

055: 10 Years Today

2009-09-18T21:00:00.006+08:00

Today, my MSN/Hotmail email turns 10. Wow! 10 years flown so fast. Somehow, I regretted choosing an email address that don't define me now. Like, what the hell is imldr? (No, I'm not telling, not significant anyway). Should have taken my nickname (still using it now!). MSN Messenger is also celebrating their 10th year anniversary. Hmm.. Probably I signed up this email for Messenger? Can't recall.

And since it has been 10 years of the same email, how about a change? (I'm still considering though)

The Internet have changed (a lot!) over the past 10 years. We have seen many applications, sites, etc, came, and disappear before you can even say "Google". So here I present you, 10 sites/applications/etc that we used to love and adore. Without them we would probably die (at that time).

Napster - The "God" of music sharing. Who dare say that you were against piracy and never use this application before? Bullcrap! Napster was the shit! Limewire is not even close to their level of greatness. The pioneer of music "sharing", they really make record labels go crazy over their dipping records sales (or so they claimed). Artists like Metallica (yeah, can you believe it, Metallica!) and Eminem start their boycott on the application. They have their supporters though, like The Offspring, who supported Napster and even gave out a million dollars (out of their own pocket) to a lucky downloader of their new single at that time (if you guys go to my MSN Profile, you can see the statement made by the vocalist, Dexter Holland. Shit, I have not edited my MSN Profile for 10 years?!). Download was fast too. It only took me less than 5 seconds to download a track. Probably because I was one of the few who uses cable, but still, it's like a speeding bullet! Napster still exist now. I recently surf my way in and try searching for songs that are rare (really rare), and they have it! But damn, it's only available to US residents! No fair! Where the hell am I going to get songs by Swallowing Shit or Craig's Brothers? Only they have it!
mIRC - Okay, this thing is pre-1999. But who doesn't love IRC? I was hooked to it back then. Friends I made over there was awesome. But too much IRC is hazardous. I learn this the hard way. Redemption is on its way, but will it be enough? Who would have though that something you chose to do when you were young, will affect you when you are grown up? IRC still exist, but I guess nobody uses it. I got over it many years ago. :-P
MSN Messenger - Do I need to elaborate further? MSN owns Yahoo! anytime!
Neopets - Not everybody's favourite, but it was mine! It's like the advance/online version of the Tamagotchi or Digimon. You can raise cute (or ugly) pets and battle other users. It was my favourite, but somebody hacked into my account and stole everything!
Alamak.com - Everybody's favourite, but definately NOT mine. Another chatroom thingy, and I hated it. Next!
AudioGalaxy - After the "demise" of Napster, AudioGalaxy came to save the day! Another speedy application to download mp3, but you have to be smart though. Let's say you want to download a song by Joss Stone (Note: she was not around at that time), you will have to change the spelling of her name, something like Josh Stoney or something. Yup, smart people at AudioGalaxy.
Friendster - Pioneer of social networking? It suck now. All repeat after me. "Friendster sucks!" But didn't we go gaga over it when it was launched? Very typical of us to abandon something after they are of no use. The reason was probably because of the lagging in that site.:-P Facebook would probably get the same treatment sooner or later. So why did NUS (yes, National University of Singapore) offers a new course on Facebook Programming? WTF? Graduate: "I graduated with a Degree in Facebook Programming" Prospect employer: "But we don't use Facebook anymore"
MSN Gaming Zone - I used to play boring board games like checkers here against other online users. It was fun, and we get to build our own rep sheet or something. That was where I get my nickname, DemonChild (how the spelling changed to DaemonChylde? That's another story).
Yahoo! - Admit it! We rely on Yahoo! solely for searching (some of you still do now). We don't Google it. We Yahoo! it! (Or was there another term for Yahooing?) Come on people, show some love to Yahoo! and search through their search engine once in awhile (I'm guilty of Googling too :-P )
Blogger - How can I put this at the very end? Very inconsiderate of me! Was Blogger the first in blogging? I remember signing up for Blogger first, then switched to Diaryland. The reason I chose Blogger now is simply because they still have the blog that I used to write in, and Diaryland don't. I'm still figuring out the password for my old blog. What was it...

10 years flies so fast. Hope the next 10 will be a slow one. Please pretty please!!!!!

054: The Few Days of "Fame" Aftermath

2009-09-14T23:38:00.006+08:00

From "Hot For Words"

A pleasant surprise awaits me when I log in to my StatCounter the next day after I post the previous entry. I received more than 300++ unique visits to my blog. I was like, "What?!". Didn't occur to me that it will reach that amount in just one day. Only after seeing the referrals link that I realized that a celebrity (whom I've never even heard of) came across this page!

She is Marina Orlova, a philologist, and an Internet star. She have a YouTube channel called Hot For Words, where she discussed the origins of words (with a high dosage of sexiness of course). Now, who would have thought that a smokin' hot lady like her possesed a geek brain? Her videos show her witty streaks and... Oh boy, words can't describe you babe. You're really too hot for words. (And now I'm a subcriber to your home page!).

She put up the link to my blog in her site, and you know the rest. Hundreds of visitors for the past few days. Woah!

Well, it's dropping though. My few days of "fame". LOL!!!

If only this kind of coincidence occurs every day. ;-)

P/S: Thank you Marina. ;-)

053: Ms. Hot For Words

2009-09-12T00:53:00.003+08:00

Sketch by DanceMasterV via deviantART

On the way back from class
In a crowded train
Eyes looking through window glass
Saw a girl in blue hoodies
Black skirt and black glasses
"Varsity Blues" her hoodie says

Oh my she was beautiful
Geeky and nerdy
Yet so elegant
Yet so gorgeous!
Like a photography model
In a upper class magazine spread

She was reading a book
With much concentration
"Why Men Lie and Women Cry"
Read the cover of the book
Aaron said, "Go up and say 'Hi'"
But don't you know I'm too shy?
I kept staring at her
You can say that I was hooked
By her gaze on her book

A 'minah' entered the cabin
I realized she was staring at me
Well, Fuck you bitch!
You're not my type
If I'm interested in you
My brain might have a glitch

Aaron said,
"Let's give her a name!"
"Miss Nerdy Hoodie?" I said
Cracking our heads for a name
A name so beautiful
To fit her face

"Miss Hot For Words"
That would probably fit
Because she's so boiling hot
Even words can't describe

052: Deadline...

2009-09-10T20:07:00.001+08:00

Tomorrow is the deadline for my advertising stuff...

Die... Confirm die!

052: Train Conversations

2009-09-06T18:59:00.004+08:00

Photo by slacsatu via deviantART

Conversations heard in the train... Probably foreign worker.

Lady 1: *pointing to the MRT map* I've been to this station, this station, and that one...
Lady 2: Oh, I went to there and here and that one.
Lady 1: I also been to the purple line, to here and then there.
Lady 2: I also been here and there... and also here..

*Conversations continues for the next 10 mins. Same shit over and over again!*

Funny? Maybe not. But Me and Aaron had a good laugh.

051: Nostalgic Textbook

2009-08-31T22:17:00.009+08:00

Or maybe the word nostalgia is not relevant anymore in this new cutting edge millennium (whatever I meant, :-P ). Old skool... Yeah, that's the term we use today. Old... Skool... Thanks to my classmate, KY, he updated his Twitter with the link to the above movie, The Teenage Textbook Movie. Damn, this brings back memories.

Maybe some of you don't know about this movie. Still too young? (They never play on TV meh?) Anyway, this movie was released when I was in Secondary One (yeah, 11 years ago). No need for me to be a reviewer and write what this movie is all about. All I will say is that it was adapted from the book The Teenage Textbook by Adrian Tan. He was an NUS undergraduate when he wrote the book in 1988 (correct me if I'm wrong, and no, I didn't type the year by mistake. Written in 1988). It's all about the life (or should I say, love life) of a bunch of teens in a JC and etc etc etc... It was one of the top grossing movie, beating some Hollywood flicks at that time.

The main star, Melody Chen, was cute, and still is. I saw her in my apartment's lift (yes, in my fucking lift!!!), and she got me all melting. With her tanned skin, she was hot!!!

Now I wonder... What is happening to the local movie scene? (Please, don't talk about Jack Neo please!) Now, when we think of local movies, those arty farty kind comes to mind. Okay, maybe there are a few commercial type like One Leg Kicking or The Leap Years. But that's it? (Don't tell me those chinese languaged titles, not counted. I need to read subtitles to enjoy it, which sucks). Give us more English language movie please! With no Chinese, Malay, or Indian dialogues in it!

The Teenage Textbook Movie was probably the first movie that released a soundtrack that only include music by local musicians and singers, which was cool. The song No More Tears written by John Klass and sung by Beverly (whatserlastname) really reminds me of my puberty years, :-P

Can anybody help me get the soundtrack please!

-------------------------------

Lyrics taken from http://www.secretzreality.com/2008/05/teenage-textbook-soundtrack.html
Link to the song: http://www.imeem.com/people/wk9EHFz/music/BisyLuGJ/beverly-no-more-tears

No more tears
by beverly

isn't it amazing
how seventeen can be
isn't it so exciting
just like romance novel’s scenes

colourful pictures on the wall
always waiting for the telephone call
a cry in the dark
a broken heart
a first-time kiss
I've seen it all

I'm finally leaving
nothing left to fear
its so worth believing
I see it all so clear
its more than a disc or books
it goes on and on and on and on, oh yeah
this time I'm finally giving
no more tears

isn't just a wonder
how life sometimes turns out
wouldn't it be so perfect
if all things came without doubt

colourful pictures on the wall
always waiting for the telephone call
a cry in the dark
a broken heart
a first-time kiss
I've seen it all

I'm finally leaving
nothing left to fear
its so worth believing
I see it all so clear
this time I'm giving
everything I've got
wanna believe in myself
its more than a disc or books
it goes on and on and on and on, oh yeah
this time I'm finally giving
no more tears

050: An Evening In Journalism

2009-08-21T02:25:00.005+08:00

Cartoon by ~EstudioSun via deviantART

Two evenings ago...

Lecturer: So have any one of you read Ali Baba before? Anyone? *pause* Iqbal?

Me: Err... I only read it as a kid...

Lecturer: Ya, but have you read the original version?

Me: No.

Lecturer: You should read it.

Me: I heard there's a lot of porn in the book.

Lecturer: Err........ I wouldn't say it's porn... There are sex ...

N: Is it true?

*Whole class starts whispering and talking among each other*

A: *whispers to C*- Is it past his sanity hour?

Lecturer: Well, it is about *tells the stories*... You should find it in the library

I got the class sex-cited. :-P

049: Entrepreneurship

2009-08-13T21:55:00.010+08:00

Cartoon by ~psshaw via deviantART

Online businesses are all the rage now (or was that last year's news?). I chanced upon a Multiply site by someone who is selling her used stuff. And those stuffs are not the average consumerism product (or so I thought). Items for sale includes some Kate "I'm so chic wearing this bag" Spade, Victoria's "look at my titties" Secret, and even Bobbi "I'm ugly so glam me up" Brown.

The wonders of new media (they even have a new course for New Media in Republic Polytechnic! But lifespan? No one knows.). Starting up is a breeze. Register (a blog, Facebook, etc), set-up, yada yada yada (you should know the rest).

But thinking of what to sell? Ahhhh, now that's the challenge. If your closet is filled with junks that you barely use, then it will be easy. Just sell them off online! But what about the rest? Go D.I.Y. (create and design shirts, acessories, etc)? Buy something in bulk cheaply and sell it?

Usually, we will think of something cool and hip. That's when our imagination will go wild, and think of something that is near to impossible. And when you realized your creative ideas are not practical, then you will feel discouraged and stop thinking about it altogether, without considering any other options.

Some of my friends are doing these online business. One of them sells cakes (yum yum). Did I hear you say, "common"? Well, unlike some of us, she used something redundant to her advantage. I can't say her cake's design are creative (because I've not been in there for a long time), but she could use her creativity in those cakes. She probably experimented with her baking and came up with some new shit (oops, cakes and shit don't go along hand in hand huh?)

There are some who gave up though. Lack of site viewership? This is where web designs and layout comes in. If you have a website that looks like it belongs to an owner who just learned how to create a website (which most of them are anyway), then get an expert! Web design and layout is IMPORTANT! If your site is like this (my site in 2002), then you need serious help. People will lose interest and click the 'X' button on the top right if it's like that. I know I would.

I want to make money online too. Not through selling... through my blog! There is this application that let me earns some cash if the traffic to my blog is high.

So, how do I generate that traffic flow? Advertise? And what will be my 'selling' points? I'm too shy to advertise my blog (I don't even know where to start), and nobody would read it anyway. I wrote boring entries (and this is probably one of them). And that's because I've mellowed down. But if mellowing down 'rape' me off my chance of getting an extra income, then I guess I need to look deep inside my immature 16 years old's (I wish) heart, and start trashing and dissing other people (that's what they like to read nowadays).

Now... Would that makes me an entrepreneur?

048: ...and one of the shortest.

2009-08-10T16:34:00.003+08:00

Oh, before I forget... I got myself the new Killswitch Engage's album! Weeeee!!!!!!

Anyway, I think I'm........ Nevermind....

047: Probably the longest entry so far...

2009-08-08T00:30:00.006+08:00

Photo by =anekdamian via deviantART

Today, I was being an arse. It was one of the worse day at work. I was rushing the whole fucking day! Got me tired and sticky (the air-con was not helping). And the stupidity of some people there... How the hell can I send a shipment to the U.S. when the address given was routed to Mexico? I was running around like mad. And left the place late!

But still manage to attend class though, with my blood temperature still boiling high. Maybe I was being mean to my group members earlier this evening.

I entered class a little late, and the second I entered, one of them said, "Hey, we are discussing the 2 questions on the slide". *points to the front* Some market segmentation and product positioning questions. "Determining your target audience..." was all I could said. I just arrived and was still sweating (the distance from the MRT to the school is not that far, but it's the heat I guess). Apparantly we were supposed to determine the different segmentation of the audience, and our group was arguing on what was right and wrong (I think I started it). And I've had it...

Me: *Raises hand* Sir, can you explain your questions again? I was late earlier and didn't get to listen.
Lecturer: Oh, you can ask your group mem...
Me: I don't think they understand what it's all about!
N: I do..

I can feel my group members looking at me, probably wondering what was wrong. And the person who replied "I do" really DO understood them. If I'm white, my face would probably be red.

Break time came and I had a smoke with "N". We had a serious discussion on our project. Intially, I was planning to do an advertising campaign for Apple. I was thinking of a huge campaign (which I have not discuss with them). But he was worried if we used Apple as a product to market, as it is a huge company with track records of good and effective marketing, and we probably could not think of a better advertising strategy than the ones they are having now.

It does make sense though. At first I was thinking of waving it off. I thought of just going ahead with it. We need to be daring, right Then I realised that the others were sceptical about it too.

*Two weeks ago*

Me: I've decided! We are going to use Apple!
A: Hmm.... Why Apple?

Same reply from the other one. I can see they were having doubts about it. Even awhile ago, they were still clueless.

*Last week*

W: I don't know what to think about Apple. I know peanuts about it.
Me: Okay, you guys seemed to be having doubts about this. If you guys have any other ideas in mind, PLEASE, tell me! I'm open to other ideas. Just suggest something. You guys got one?
C to W: From his face, it's obvious that he wants to do this his way. So I think we will just go with it.

Woah! What am I becoming? Is this me? I was being authoritative! For some reason, I'm really serious about this project. Competitiveness was one of them. And where the hell does this competitive streak came from?

I entered class before break ended, and I told the others that I want a change in product. We really can't think of any. The remaining time in class, I kept thinking about what we should use. Was cracking my head like the nutcracker (what the fuck siah?). And I suddenly came up with the most ridiculous idea.

Me: Ice-cream!
A: What about it?
Me: You see those teens who like to walk around while eating lollipop? We can try to make them eat ice-cream instead!
*All with puzzled look*
A: Ice-cream on a stick? Like Paddle-Pop...
Me: Yes! Paddle-Pop!
W: Well, I like to eat that.
Me: Then it will be great! You should know about it and all.
W: I only like to eat it. That's all.
C: What's so special about Paddle-Pop?
W: The taste! Like when you put it in your mouth, oooh... Orgasmic feeling.
*All looked at me in a weird way*

I was just fooling around anyway. Eating Paddle-Pop will never be the same again for "W". :-P

I was still frustrated though, as I could not think of any ideas. "C" probably saw my shit face, and say, "Iqbal really looked damn stressed tonight". "Ya, work was shit"

After class, "A", "C", and I stayed for awhile, and came up with a fantastic idea. Just need to discuss it with "W" and "N".

Can't wait for it! But should I apologize for my behaviour? Do they really noticed it in the first place?

*shrugs it off* :-P

It's 2 a.m, and I'm crapping in here.

046: "New On Facebook!"

2009-08-06T22:00:00.004+08:00

There is a new page in Facebook, and I think I'm hooked to it. It's called "Anti Minah & Kenings". Maybe I'll write about it next time (suddenly my mind went blank!).

045: Lucky (Not so...)

2009-07-27T01:33:00.012+08:00

Checked my mail, and results are in!!!

I thought I'm going to fail my Public Relations module. I really screwed up on that paper. And I was hoping to get at least a 'D' for that crap module. Not something I'd go for, but at least it's a PASS. And was confident that I would get an 'A' for TVRP.

But guess what? I got a 'C' for PR!!!! Woooohoooooooooooo!!!!! Mr. ***, I don't 'hate' you anymore. :-P

But a 'B' for TVRP? Damn it!!! It couldn't be! Well, I studied two days before the exam for the paper, but still!!! How can I get a 'B'??!!

Must have screwed up on one of the questions... But which one eh?

Will never find out. If only they return the papers back, like in secondary school. :-P

In this new term, I promise I will keep last minute revision at bay.

*With the fingers crossed* ;-D

044: Missing you already...

2009-07-22T01:13:00.005+08:00

I got the news. You're gone. And I didn't get the chance to bid farewell. You left me without any warning. I never knew the relationship between us is going to be over so soon. My heart already knew that you are going to rock my world. And rock my world you did. But only for a moment? I thought our love was everlasting.

I wonder what would I give to have you here again. I want to go back in time to where we started. Hoping and praying that I would find a way to turn back time. I am willing to pledge my devotion for you.

Can you feel my agony? I'm longing for you.
Can you feel my misery? I'm yearning for you.
Can you feel my pain? My heart broke for you.
Can you feel my sorrow? I mourn for those who never knew you.

My heart still beats you name.... Cinnamon Melts...

043: Operation Failure

2009-07-18T15:42:00.006+08:00

Photo by =birddreams

Work was crazy!!! I am currently attached to this place at Alps Ave. The guy that was supposed to be there had an accident, so I'm covering his place (somebody else tried to cover his place, and he couldn't do it). It was really a stressful place to be working in. Their procedures and protocol are different from mine, and I need to really get familiar with it.

The first week was okay, as I had a partner to help me out. But since Monday, I've been doing all the work alone, and everything was messed up. My desk was cluttered with invoices & manifests, stationery, labels, etc. And I need to rush, as I got deadline (or for my case, timeline) to meet. I got everything jumbled up that I screwed up for most of the days this week, including earlier today.

A shipment that was supposed to be sent to Anchorage, Alaska, was instead sent to Memphis, Tennessee (both U.S. cities). I have already alerted the relevant people. Hopefully, I was on time.

If the stupid thing really go to Tennessee, then I'll be dead on Monday (I'll be dead even if it goes to the correct destination, because of the documentation I had done). It will be a troublesome process. The damn thing will be sent back to Singapore, before going to Alaska.

E-mails will start flying, money will be lost, and I... ???

Better plan of a new strategy to avoid mistakes like that from happening again. If I can't handle something like that, then how am I going to survive if I get a new job later? Any new job that I will be taking, will be more demanding than this, probably 2-3 times more?

Need to learn how to handle stress and multi-task (the only multi-tasking that I'm able to do is eating while typing on my lappy with the cellphone on).

How do you office people handle this kind of stress??!!

042: Chaotic Week

2009-07-12T18:45:00.005+08:00

Photo by ~redjoker321 via DeviantArt

What a week! I have not been sleeping well, due to last minute revision (myself to blame, I know, don't tell me). And the only subject I was concentrating on was TV and Radio Production. And the paper was great! Don't have to worry about that one.

But Public Relations was crap! Shit! How come no questions on 'propaganda' appeared??!! That topic was the one I concentrated like crazy, and the question didn't come up? The paper was shit, and I'm not the only one who said it.

But it's all over (for now), and enjoy my one week school break...

Wait... Don't think I'll be enjoying this coming week. At work, I'm currently attached to another location at Alps Ave (near Changi Airport Cargo Complex), and I'll be working alone!

Yeah, alone!

I don't mind working alone actually. But I can't work alone if there's a shitload amount of work! I almost screwed up big time last week (panic attack). But think I'm getting better at it, so I'd probably whine even more when I'm asked to leave that place (the guy who was supposed to be there had an accident, so this is a case of another person's misfortune, another person's gain).

I hope he will be on MC for two months. Hahahax! I'm not being evil, but you will still get paid if you're on two months' MC, so might as well he stay at home and rest, while getting paid.

Oops, I'm already late (for my Monster Hunter killing quest with my buddies!)
:-P

041: Halal

2009-07-04T06:58:00.003+08:00

Me: Woah! See that cute girl!!
E: That Chinese girl?
Me: Yup yup!
E: You don't mind a Chinese girl ah?
Me: Nope. Not at all.
E: You had a Chinese girlfriend before?
Me: Yup. Why? You don't date Malay boys?
E: I do.. My ex-boyfriend is 'Halal'...

Muahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahax!!!!!!!!

040: Lost Opportunity

2009-06-30T01:08:00.002+08:00

Sometimes I wonder whether there is such things as coincidence... Or was God really testing me? Maybe He's trying to test my patience.

But this time, things have gone too far... It's really unfair...

Something good better happen.

039: I'm A Monster Hunter!

2009-06-28T04:14:00.003+08:00

I have not been giving my lappy some lovin' since the past few days. Because I'm currently hooked to Monster Hunter Freedom 2!!!

I was in national service when I played the first installment. This game brings me and the others closer. We could link our Playstation Portable (PSP) and fight the monster together. We could barely survive if we played this game by ourselves. Spent one year playing this game with them, and after I ORD, the game was still not completed! Yes, it's that difficult!

Recently, Sufian and Shafari (both my NS buddies) restarted their Monster Hunter era . I couldn't resist the temptation of playing it again with them. So I bought a new PSP (my first PSP 'died' last year, and my 2nd PSP can't be modified).

The sequel is wicked!!! There's a lot of changes in this one. Lots of new monsters, weapons, armor, etc. Probably will take a year to finish it (I hope not). Anybody want to join us in our monster hunting missions?

They are releasing a new one next week. Monster Hunter Freedom United! Probably I'll just play the current one first... This game is time consuming. And exams is in two weeks...

Gotta control myself.

038: Final Edit

2009-06-19T01:27:00.004+08:00

This is the final cut. Could be better, but we had time constraint. It's still cool I guess.

What do you think?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!

037: TVRP

2009-06-17T02:26:00.004+08:00

The shooting last Saturday went well. Here's my production crews. This was taken after a long day of running around. More pics in Facebook.

It was fun! The aftermath is horrible and chaotic (I'm exaggerating, what's new?). Proposal, scripting, scene-by-scene treatment. All the boring stuff, after we had fun.

The rough cut of the video is in YouTube by the way. But I'm not going to post it here yet. Just wait for the final cut (should be up by Thursday).

Anyway, I used to have Taek-won-do class on every Wednesday. Now my Wednesdays will be filled with a healthy activity again.

Going to gym. (Now that's new!)

036: Model? Me? Oh, I'm Flattered... NOT!

2009-06-11T02:46:00.007+08:00

Last evening, I was on my way to meet my group members for our television production proposal and stuff. We will be doing an outdoor shooting this Saturday, and I bet it will be fun! It’s definately fun than the essay that I have to do for Public Relations. Anyway, while I was walking outside Bugis Junction (meeting was at the National Library), a lady approached me. Introducing herself as “whatever her name is” and “whatever the fuck company’s name” she’s from. Turn out she’s from the modelling agency, and telling me I could model for ads and stuff.

I’ve always known that these people are always scouting for “talents” at Bugis, and two of my friends have been approached by them before. But hell, those two are good looking tall guys! When did a 170cm ugly hardcore kid fit into that category? I’m not like the two actor and actress in the above video (it’s the new Killswitch Engage’s video by the way, quite emotional, and somehow it gives me ideas on what to write for my essay, even though there's no link between Killswitch Engage and Public Relations, :-P).

I know what they are after. My money! My friend once told me that these companies will ask you to pay a few hundred bucks for a photo portfolio, in order to let the clients choose. We will only be modelling when we are chosen. Now, whoever the fuck will choose me?

I know you are desperate, especially in this economy downturn. But please, choose wisely. You will mislead the ‘looks impaired’ people, especially the ones who really wanted to be seen in magazines and posters, but lack the ‘package’ (whatever the fuck that means).

The only package I know is parcels from the post office. :-P

035: No Halloween, But I Still Wanna Get These...

2009-06-08T23:39:00.006+08:00

No, not the poster...

I WANT THE MASKS!!!

Me: Mama, look at these, nice right? Wanna get em'.
Mum: Ah??? Are you out of your mind? You call these nice?
Me: Nice what...
Mum: *sigh* All my sons are weird. You are no longer a small kid; you can get married already...
Me: Married?

I ask the wrong person, but I can't contain my excitement upon seeing those masks in eBay.

If I order all 9 masks, I'll be 900 bucks poorer ($900 includes shipping). So maybe I'll get only one?

And which one shall it be?

034: Engage! (I promise, no more Killswitch Engage. This is entirely different!)

2009-06-03T00:32:00.005+08:00

Photo by ~Stratixfied

I received an SMS last week. It goes something like this, "Hi all, ***** (******) here. I'm getting engage next Sunday on the 7th of July. My address (insert details here)"

Well, he told me about it many months back. But damn! How come everyone is getting engage or married? Why??!! Don't go to the dark side!!! Not now! Wait till we are reaching thirty or something. After twenty-five at least!

Lucky for me, I'm currently hanging out with friends who don't have marriage in their mind (well, some of them are attached, so probably will hear some 'shocking' news sooner or later without any warning, and it will most probably start with engagement).

I got my dose of shocking news last year, when a friend suddenly decided to get married. I was like, "What the fuck?!" Not forgetting an ex-girlfriend who invited me to her engagement (invite me through her sister, expect me to come ah?). What happened to "Marriage? Not in my early twenties" philosophy that we used to have?

Looks like they are following their heart, and replaced the 'i' in Live with an 'o'...

Err.... I make it sound as if it is a bad thing, Hahahax!!! Nope, I'm not against marriage. It's just that every time I heard of engagements/weddings, it reminds me of how fast time flies and how much older I'm getting.

I want a cure to growing older...

033: "Reckoning"

2009-05-30T05:25:00.006+08:00

Art cover from Roadrunner Records

I just put up the info about Killswitch Engage's upcoming new album yesterday. I've known about it for quite some time now, and suddenly feel like screaming about it yesterday (since it's only one month away).

But out of a sudden, I received an email from Roadrunner with the title, "Get A Free MP3 Of Killswitch Engage's New Track Now, For 24 Hours Only..." I rushed to download it. And boy, it was great!!!! And I'm one of the first in the world to listen to it!!! Awe-fuckin-some!!!! A few hours later, some people put it up on YouTube. Haha! I'm still one of the first, :-P

Now I really can't wait for their new album. They are my heroes!

032: Killswitch Engage Gonna Kick My Arse With Their New Album!!! (Hopefully)

2009-05-29T02:29:00.004+08:00

From their recording label, Roadrunner Records

Been a Killswitch Engage fan since my NS days (2005), and at that time I was listening to their 2nd album, Alive or Just Breathing (2002). This is their 5th, and I can't fucking wait!!!! Release date: June 30th 2009. Wooohooooooooo!!!!!! It's a self titled album (Note: No Album Title). They already released a self titled album, why again? But fuck it!!! They never disappoint. Hope they don't start now, please!!!!

031: If Assholes Can Fly, Singapore Will One Day Become An Airport

2009-05-24T21:21:00.004+08:00

Photo by ~Kjaeremandag

I was in the train last Friday, going home from class. I was dozing off when suddenly two China girl entered the cabin. They were running for the seats beside me. An old man was running after it too. He was about to get it, but the China girls was 2 seconds ahead. The girls saw the man, but ignored him. I was about to stand and gave him my seat, when he suddenly ran to the other side, getting a seat by the glass panel.

I have a lot of stories to share about these kind of foreign workers. I could even write a book about them! Fuck! I think the relevant authorities should give them a 3 months basic skills course to educate them about graciousness, cleanliness, etc. These are the things that the bloody foreigners should learn:

This is Singapore! You need to speak English!!! It does not matter how crappy it is, as long as we can fucking understand you! Don't speak Chinese to us, cause we don't fucking understand!!
If you wanna go get drunk, go to the beach or something. Not our childrens' playground!!!
Don't look at our girls/women in a weird way. The government legalized Geylang (Lorong) for foreigners like you!!! So go there instead!!
For the educated Indian national, don't treat our customer service staff like you treat yours in India. You may be treated like a God in your country, but here, you are just a CUSTOMER!!! A poor family's one room flat in Singapore could probably buy a mansion in your selfish country that prefers to launch a rocket in outer space than fighting poverty. You're like those selfish bastards! So stop your arrogance, and if you can't, go back!!!
Don't look at me as if I'm some kind of freak. You're the freak!!! So look the other way!
You want to chill out at Geylang (Serai), Chinatown, or Little India during the weekends. I understands. You have the right to enjoy life after contributing so much to our country. But please, stop making an arse of yourself!!!
When you're in a crowded place, don't fucking hold a stranger's shoulders!! I'm not your fucking friend, neither am I your fellow countrymen. Keep your fucking hands off me!!!
And the list goes on and on and on......

I realised not all foreigners are like these assholes. But if I think 65% of them are, then something is really wrong! I appreciate their help in building our country. Want to be fully dependent on our fellow Singaporeans? Cannot lah! We still need them (especially for the jobs we Singaporeans don't want to be in). And they really should go to some basic course on how to live in Singapore. And make this course compulsary for everyone, even the high class bastards! Then maybe the rate of inconsiderate foreigners will decline slowly, and Singapore won't be an airport afterall. :-P

030: Career

2009-05-21T00:19:00.004+08:00

Photo by *amptone

The interview I went the other day didn't go well. Actually, I refused to join them. Not a career path I had in mind. They do offer a a high salary and some good remuneration stuff. But it's just not for me.

Some asked why I want to switch job in the current economy turmoil. Well, here's why:

It's getting boring each passing day (I'm good at my work)
I don't get recognition for the work I have done (from the higher authority)
I was promised something, but due to the economic downturn, they changed their mind
I want better benefits and remuneration package
My overtime was cut down (again, the economy's fault)
I want a career that is fulfilling

Am I too demanding? Anyway, when I was younger, I wanna be:

A lawyer (but my defination of justice differs from the state's law)
A teacher (my friends say i would turn the kids into DemonChild, like me)
An international rock star / metal head (my band is on a 'permanent hiatus', so looking for new members to start fresh, or bands that need a microphone terrorizer. Note: I growl and scream)
A doctor (but afraid that I'll be one of the first to get some new virus e.g the swine flu)
A vigilante (but I have no superpowers, or skills like The Punisher)
A rebellious politician (I doubt any government would want me in their cabinet)
An activist (but I can't earn much money through doing this)

But now, the only jobs that are vacant (and the ones that I never consider joining) are:

Driver (I still need to get familiarize with the local roads)
Sales Assistant (they don't hire ugly people like me)
Customer Service (communication skills needed, and don't think I have it)
Financial Advisor (too lazy to look for clients)
Auxiliary Police Officers (I don't want to work shifts, and I don't like to be in uniforms)
Waiter (don't expect me to hold the tray with one hand)
And the list goes on.....

I'm grateful though, that I still have a job. There are others who are jobless (some of them are my friends), and really need the bucks to survive. Maybe I shouldn't complain, but I'm human too! I will never be satisfied with what I have.

For those who are still finding a job/career, I wish you the best of luck. I hope you get it soon, cause you can't barely survive in this country without a job.

029: Discussions

2009-05-18T07:04:00.004+08:00

Photo from http://www.avert.org

Da: Maybe we could put some pictures of the disease or something.

Me: Ya, maybe we can put a picture of vaginas bleeding or anus rotting.

*Everyone laughs*

Da: Man, you're sick dude, ya know. You are sick.

Me: No no, I mean pictures of those things when you get STDs.

Sh: I think we put up pictures of infections on the body parts...

Me: That's what I meant!!!!

Sh: Oh, Hahaha!! You make it sound so pornographic.

Me: Well, maybe we can add some pornographic violence?

I searched for pictures, and above was the least disgusting that I could find. Go the the website for some vaginas or anus, I don't want to put it here as it may seemed that I'm promoting porn. :-P

028: Choice

2009-05-16T02:53:00.003+08:00

Photo by ~shotgunxfabulous

*Phone vibrates*

Me: Hello?

D: Hello, Iqbal. C went to another group ah?

Me: Ah?? *puzzled*

D: Ya, she told me she is joining another group.

Me: Oh, I don't know about...

D: You don't know??!!

Me: Well, she didn't tell me about it. I left class immediately just now. Alot of people didn't turn up for class and we were separated into different groups for the current class stuff. Didn't know she's joining another group.

D: Then we are supposed to meet up this sunday right?

Me: Ya, you plan lah. If she wants to leave, let it be. She won't be of any use to us anyway.

D: Don't say like that lah.

Me: You just plan, and tell me the info for sunday later.

Well, if one person decided to leave the group, let it be. It's her choice. And I don't think I can work together with her. In every discussions, she just brush off my opinions, thinking she's smarter than me (in the end my opinion was always highlighted by the lecturer [not always, but usually]). Well, good riddance.

I bet the other members are panicking right now. Probably the were thinking, "Oh, the smart one left!" *Roll eyes* Puh-leez, she's not that smart! The reason she can relate to the module is because she's in the media itself! (Hence the arrogance) So what I'm going to do, is draw up a communication plan and a powerpoint slide first. If we are meeting this Sunday, then I'll surprise them with my draft. *beams*

Erm.... Just one day to draft the whole thing...

Feeling lazy suddenly.... Yawnzzzzzzzz..........

027: Heart Burst Into Fire

2009-05-14T03:41:00.004+08:00

Photo by ~lucaszoltowski

Well, Siti was right. "Something bad is going to happen", she said.

I was having some chest pain on sunday (too much smoke? Nah!!!!). It was unbearable. So went to the clinic, do some ECG, and voila! The doctor made me an appointment to the cardiologist at the hospital, because of some irregularities in my heart beat. Told my friend Siti about it (she's a nurse, so figured I'd ask her opinion) and she was shocked at first. But when told the appointment is in July, then she said, "Oh, then it's not serious". But she asked whether I was feeling any heartache, and say that if I do, something bad gonna happen. And it's not related to my health. I get what she meant. I just brushed it off, telling her, "Nah!".

Tuesday it got worse, so decided to go to the hospital after midnight. Just my luck, got myself a naggy doctor. Told him I'm not sure of the pain, and he starts making noise, telling me I should know and stuff. What the fuck! Long story short, another ECG taken, a blood test (and that was the worse blood test I ever gone through, ouch!), results analyzed, and the doctor told me there's nothing wrong with my heart. Phew!!!!! God was i relieved!!! But I still need to see the cardiologist though. Hopefully it all goes well.

Stayed at home (MC for 3 days), sleep, surf... Well, something DID happened...

Siti was right. Something bad gonna happen.... And it's not health related...

Heartache... Millions milligrams of heartache.

I wish I could type it all out here. I just... can't... I won't argue with those who have found happiness in what they do.

Genevieve once told me, "your entries reveal so much about you, yet reveal so little."

Don't think I want to reveal too much. Think I've been exposing myself in the previous entries.

Now, not only do I need to recover from my chest pain, I need to heal my heartache.

Good luck to that!!!

026: Communication Plan

2009-05-11T02:51:00.004+08:00

Photo by ~aNdikapatRya

The Ministry of Education (MOE) is concerned with the increasing number of teenagers (aged 13-18) who are indulging in casual sex. This has resulted in an alarming increase in sexually transmitted disease and HIV.

My public relations firm has been approached to develop a communication campaign to create awareness among teenagers about dangers of casual sex. Explain what I would do in each of the following categories that relate to the structure and content of persuasive messages:

Drama
Statistics
Examples
Testimonials
Endorsement
Emotional Appeals

Now where do I start. My mind is filled with blanks. Been blank since yesterday. I can't think. I can't focus. It's like being in a four walled prison cell and trying to figure out how to escape. I only have 3 weeks to finish this.

H.E.L.P.........

025: Monkey Love In Slow Motion

2009-05-04T03:00:00.006+08:00

I find this really cute. That's my 16 years old brother, and his girlfriend. Oh, boy! This pic is taken from his girlfriend's Tagged site (my brother forgot to logged out from the site [he used my lappy]). I browse through the girl's site, and saw more pictures of my bro. My bro left a comment, saying, "My pic lost its way here" and she replied, "No, you're a part of me". I was laughing like crazy!!!

I remembered my first crush. I was in Primary 3 (9 years old), and there's this girl by the name of Nazurah who sat beside me. We were always quarreling, calling each other names and stuff. And I liked her! She was cute and funny. I never dared to confess (yes, I've been a pussy since Pri 3, but that's for another entry) . 6-7 years back I get to know a girl, who happened to know her as well. She said the girl is now a sweet pretty headscarved girl, but sadly, I never get to see her. Even this friend of mine has dissapeared (after I pulled a nasty prank on her), and the next thing I know, she's one of the finalist for The New Paper New Face a few years back!!!! Sigh!! The perils of being young.

My siblings seemed to be lucky in love. Damn, why do I have to be the ugly ones in the family? My parents are good-looking people (hence the good looks on my siblings' faces). I'm the odd one.

I'm really the odd one. I'm the only one who needs extra aid for my vision (contact lens or specs). I'm the only one who listens to extreme music (metal, punk, jazzcore, symphonic, mathematic hardcore, etc). I'm the only who don't eat seafood (yes, even fish!).

But that makes me different and unique! Well, that's not a morale booster afterall. Someone once said to me, "You're dark... Different and unique. They want someone normal. Just be who you are, cause people like you don't come around often." Hmm.... Sugar coated words?

Another one (former classmate) said, "You're the last person that I want to speak to. You look weird, dark, and intimidating." Well, that comment doesn't go down well with me, but it's an honest one. The one that comes from the heart. I can see her reaction when she wanted to tell me that. She was afraid to say it. I'm glad she did.

Time for a change?

Nah!!! I'm too hardcore to be a gay metrosexual freak. Maybe I will when the right one came along. But I'll make sure she accepts me for who I am first!!!

I'm not going down without a fight!!

Errr.... This entry was supposed to be about my brother!!! I've written out of course!!! Maybe because it's 4 A.M, and i'm sleepy....

ZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZz........

(If there's some spelling errors or stuff like that, sorry!!! I'm half awake!)

024: If I Were a Gangster...

2009-05-02T21:53:00.005+08:00

Photo by ~rodney3

There are some who thought that I'm a gangster when they first saw me. Yeah, I don't give good first impression. But heck no! I'm no gangster. And no, I have no tattoos (some ask me this question when they viewed my quiz in Facebook. Do the quiz dammit and find out yourself!!!). I've never read a gangster's blog before. Maybe some of them have one. Never came across it yet. But if I am a gangster, then this is how my blog entry will go...

----------------------------------------------

Woke up early today (2 in the afternoon). I'm too lazy to wake up this early, but I have work to do. Me and my gang are going to beat up this guy who is flirting with my friend's cousin's classmate's girlfriend. Reached my towel, and when I was about to enter the toilet, my mum nagged non-stop about me not getting a job andd blah blah blah...

Why do I need to find a job? I'm doing great! I get lots of money through robbing the aunties, small kids, and some nerdy weak people who I think I can beat to death. And selling drugs generates a huge income that only those Degree holders can only dream. I looked in the mirror, and hated the empty spaces on my body. Need to get more tattoos. Girls dig guys with tattoos like me (Iqbal's Note: I've been observing this trend for a long time. How come those innocent/sweet looking chicks end up with them?). Will get myself inked when I have the money.

Meet up with my gang at Geylang. The guy that we want to strike works there, in some coffee shop stall. Long story short, beat up the guy, and leave. Then we separate, because some police were patroling the area. Why do the police have to be around? Scares the crap out of me!

Meet up with my bros again at night. We went clubbing, and I tried to score some hoochie-momma there. Bought a girl some drinks, and bring her to the hotel at Geylang to have some fun! Saw some police again, and I tried to look like an innocent bastard. Phew!!! Lucky they didn't stop me. Checked in to the cheapest hotel that I know, and the fun begins!!!

What a great life I'm having!

----------------------------------

Not a life for me. Living my life in fear of the authorities is not in my fucking dictionary.

023: Hellusion

2009-04-30T01:29:00.004+08:00

Most probably I'll be there, just to support my friends' band. Don't ask about the other bands. All I know is that it's a metal gig, and every band will be playing metal. For tickets, call/msg me.

I'm feeling so lousy right now (why do my entries have to be depressing always?). I'm yearning for something. A craving that can only be satisfied by a flame. A flame so alluring, yet alien to me.

........ I'll save it for another entry (if I decided to write about it).

022: Thursdays & Fridays

2009-04-25T00:04:00.006+08:00

In the canteen, before class starts. Cheese tofu while testing my webcam. :-P

It's seems tough. The module yesterday I mean. Looks like no more last minute studying for me. Today's class was much more laid back. But since yesterday, I felt threatened. My classmates seems to be smart people who should be in a Degree course or something. Guess I'll take it as a challenge. Or maybe I shouldn't take it too seriously. *shrugs* Time will tell. But it was definately interesting. I look forward to classes now.

For those who are working, and planning to take part-time courses, my little advice: If you could choose the modules or days to go to class, try not to take back-to-back. Like Thursday & Friday, or Monday & Tuesday, etc. Go for Monday & Friday. If you have no choice, all the best then. It won't be that difficult. Won't be easy either.

Anyway, two of my classmates from the previous course is in the Thursday class. Won't be that bored maybe. Made a new friend yesterday also. And a few others today.

School will be alright afterall.

021: Back To School (Cheese Tofu, Here I Come!)

2009-04-22T22:42:00.006+08:00

Picture by ~mr-poo

Tomorrow I'm going back to school. Same school, different classmates (probably there are some i know from the previous one), different lecturers, different expectations. This term is kind of a last minute thing. Even the days that the class will be held seems awkard. Was supposed to start in July, but decided to go ahead with this term. I just feel the need to rush. And I'm craving for the cheese tofu in the canteen. Hope the sudden turn of event won't distract my studies, work and sleep (yes, sleep).

Been sleeping early for the past few days. Maybe not that early, but still earlier than usual. Even now I'm feeling a bit sleepy (it's 2300 HRS).

I'm hoping for something right now. But don't think I want to hold my eyes any longer.

I don't even know what to do when that something happens. So yeah, sleeping is a good option now.

020: Frustration Going Up To The Max

2009-04-19T23:11:00.006+08:00

Photo by =asesinatuya

Life is not the way it used to be. Expectations running high. It won't stop running. I've been giving chase, leaving people around me. Then I find myself in a place where nothing else matters at all. Thought it was a place for me. I was definately wrong. But I just can't... I won't acknowledge it. I underestimate the risk. Overconfident. I hit and missed. Overconfidence.

So I went back, to people I have left behind. I've been gone for far too long. Afraid that they won't remember me at all. Some of them still do surprisingly. But they are all up so high, and I'm still at the bottom. Ironically, they live up to their dreams and expectations by staying there, while I was running away, chasing. Was I supposed to come back with glory? Seems I went the wrong way.

Now I'm struggling. It's getting more difficult each passing day. Now nobody will even look at me. Why would they? I'm a piece of trash, waiting for the cleaner to sweep me up. But I won't let him. I'll have myself placed in the recycling bin.

They can just wait. I'm coming my way. I'll have them know. And I'll give them something... Something to hold on to so they will not make me scrape from the bottom of the deep hole. I'll expose myself, and all I've witheld will come up to the surface.

019: Before "Cats: The Musical", There's "Aksi Mat Yoyo"!!!!

2009-04-18T00:18:00.003+08:00

Note: The title of this entry was originally by Hafiz Bastard via Facebook.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vjj2WNiSOIc

("Aksi Mat Yoyo" was a children's programme by the then Singapore Broadcasting Corporation (SBC, now called Mediacorp as you all know). I was a fan when I was just 2 years old!)

018: Tired

2009-04-17T01:17:00.003+08:00

Photo by ~dragy88

I've been very tired.... Since Monday..... The software giant needs to slow down, or else me and my collegues will die of overworking.....

But everybody is tired. You, you, and definately you (whoever you may be). So why do I keep complaining?

I lacked sleep..... And so do you....

I'm off to bed.... And so should you....

017: Cigarattes Smoke and Bedroom Lights

2009-04-12T23:02:00.005+08:00

Photo by ~ForeverTheNoose

Too much sleeping makes me hungry. I'd be scorching for food whenever I wake up from my precious sleep. And to spend the weekend sleeping might be a good idea afterall. I'm able to eat more and smoke less. I've made my bedroom a "No Smoking" zone. But if I spend the night watching movies, then that rule does not apply. :-P

Anyway, this year marks the 20th anniversary of the World Wide Web (WWW). For those who didn't know, the WWW was created by Tim Berners-Lee from the European Organization for Nuclear Research (Cern). You probably know about this organization after reading Dan Brown's Angels and Demons. Yes, they do exist. And I can't wait for the movie next month. But first, I need to re-read the book (I don't know where is it now).

Any of you guys have it???

P/S: Interesting fact - Tim Berners-Lee has fallen prey to an online scam some time ago. The founder of WWW was cheated? Looks like we ALL need to be careful.

016: Eat, Sleep, Surf!!!

2009-04-11T21:56:00.006+08:00

Photo by =katgiraffe

Blogspot must hate me. I hate big words, yet I am not able to change the text to a smaller fonts. Now I have to use some HTML code for these small words you see here.

Anyway, gonna spend my weekends eating and sleeping (most of em sleeping). Been eating McDonald's hotcakes for the past few days on my bed. Tomorrow will be no different.

It's going to be a lazy weekend. I wish for a lazy weekday. :-P

015: A Performance Even an Oscar Winner Can't Imitate

2009-04-07T00:30:00.006+08:00

Picture by ~liquidtheoryinc

Warning!!! : This entry may cause some to roll their eyes in disgust for the content that may seemed "explicit" or "emo".

It's the weekend once again, and I'm spending my time with the person I'm really in love with. I wanted to spend it only with her. But her little sister had to tag along, since her mother didn't know about us and all. We were at Toys "R" Us in Tampines Mall, and her sister were browsing stuffs for Mother's Day. How ridiculous, Mother's Day gift at Toys "R" Us? But there were stuffs for the mothers surprisingly. Me and her just stay outside, wanting to spend our time together, alone. I feel the urge to tell her my feelings, but afraid of rejection. She was talking non-stop about things that I can't be bothered with. I only wanted to express my feelings. She was so close to me. While she was talking like a hungry parrot at the bird park, I kissed her on her cheek. I can't tell the expression on her face. Stunned? Surprise? Shocked? I was waiting for a slap to land on my recovered acne skin. But something unexpected happened. She hold my two hands, and slowly, she hugged me. The hug was different from the ones I experienced before. It was not a hug from a friend. It was a hug from someone who loves you, and I could feel it. Took my chance, hug her back, hands on her bottom. A sense of accomplishment was felt, and I wished i could freeze time, so I could hold her longer.....

"Boy, EZ-Link or ticket please!"

Bastard! Where the hell did he came from? The bus is on the expressway for God's sake! Probably he alighted at Jalan Kayu. How could he disturb my morning sleep bundled with a romantic dream?! Gave him my EZ-Link, and tried to make sense of the dream earlier. The dream was so familiar. At first, I thought I had the same dream before. To my horror, I realised it was not a dream. It happened four years back!!! The dream was a reminiscences of my past. How can it invade my Dreamyland?

Loneliness is felt within me right now. It's been awhile. But Ms. Right is yet to be found. I added someone in Facebook/MSN a few weeks back. Sweet girl. Maybe I'll ask her out one day. Maybe. My self confidence has dropped sharply.

Now it's time for me to take it back!!!

014: Thambi K Seaow - Sebab Saya Shotgun

2009-03-29T10:41:00.005+08:00

A really funny but creative song by our own local band. Though this video have been around for about two years, i just discovered it. Damn!

(Sorry, It's a Malay song. Might want to check out their English songs)

013: MacPeugeot CC

2009-03-27T03:40:00.005+08:00

Photo by *cobaltfan2

I've not been online for the past 2-3 days. I was frustrated that I couldn't even browse the network, because of some stupid problems with my lappy. Starhub couldn't solve it. And even HP was puzzled by the problem with my lappy. Last resort, went to Alexandra earlier for repair, and the bugger suggested that I recover my lappy.

Now... Why the fuck didn't I think of that?

Whatever it is, I still want a Macbook Pro, because I'm sick of Windows. My friend have been using his Macbook for 3-4 years. And it's not even called Macbook!!!! It's the older version, the iBook. And it's still running smoothly like a Peugeot Cabriolet, 'fresh' from the factory (my dream car anyway).

Okay... I want a Macbook AND a Peugeot CC. You guys can sponsor me the car. You guys just transfer me 100 bucks each month. If 10 of you 'donated' a hundred bucks each, it will totalled up to 1000 smacks. And with that 1000 dollars, i can pay for the car installment plus petrol. Maybe another 5 readers will pay for road tax, parking and insurance. No, you're not giving me the moolah for free. I'll be putting all of your name on the car itself (small font, visible when you're near the car).

Any takers? If not, then the Macbook Pro will do. :-P

012: The End of All Hope

2009-03-20T01:59:00.004+08:00

Photo by *GothicNarcissus

I've been told, that hope is not lost. I'm tired of hoping. I know i have not been trying my best. But I'm one of those egoistical creature. The one who is afraid of losing face. The one who is afraid to be seen as needy. The one who is afraid to be seen as desperate.

Maybe I am overreacting. Or maybe I am moving way ahead. Maybe time will tell. Maybe, it's not the time.

All these maybes, they are an equivalent to hope. No, I don't want to hope anymore. It can be hurtful and disappointing. Being optimistic makes me expect a favorable outcome that won't happen.

Hope is indeed lost.

Maybe.

011: "Late" is My Middle Name

2009-03-16T23:04:00.003+08:00

Photo by ~vlado

Congratulations to me!! I woke up a bit early today. But i end up taking my time in the toilet and dressing up. So I still end up late to work! Usually reach work after 0930. Today i reached at 0915! *Beams*

Errr..... That's nothing to be proud of actually. I was still late! I wonder what will happen if I get a new job, and still have this punctuality attitude in me. I've been having this "problem" since my teenage years. I used to work at the hospital, and was always late. My excuse last time were, "oh, I have some last minute thing at school". But coming to work one hour late on a sunday? What excuse can you give other than, "I woke up late!". And this carries on when i worked at the airport. Even worse, I reached work 90 mins late every day.

Things changed when i was serving National Service. I was late only a few times in that 2 years I was serving the nation. After that, joined the 9-5 workforce, and maintain my good habit for a few months. Suddenly, something magical happened... TADAAAAA!!!! Back to my old habit.

I'm a very excellent and productive worker actually. Since my teenage years. Maybe that's why I didn't get the sack from my superior. But that's no excuse. One day, they'd probably get irritated and give me the boot. I may be angry at their decision, but they have to do what they have to do. Indispensibility (got such word ah?) is definately no excuse for lateness.

I have been telling myself to get 3 alarm clocks, and have been forgetting to buy them.

What is wrong with me???

010: Sleep

2009-03-15T01:49:00.006+08:00

Photo By Mike Nguyen

I have trouble going to sleep at night. On weekdays, I would sleep at 0300 Hrs, and have to join millions of adults in the workforce by 0800 Hrs. But last night I only fallen asleep at 0700 Hrs and woke up at 1800 Hrs. I still don't find it enough. My body is feeling tired right now. And as usual, I can't fall asleep!

I've been late for work since the past few months. I really need to change this attitude and try to sleep before midnight. I tried. I end up laying on my bed doing nothing, for 4 hours, before falling asleep after 0300 Hrs. I ate a couple of painkillers last sunday. It does help me feel abit sleepy. But instead of going home straight after the Career Fair and a meal in Bugis, i end up hanging out with them till 3 in the morning. :-P

Think I have found the remedy. It's painkiller. But right now I can't find any. Doctors won't easily give you that pill. Damn!

009: Reach For The Sky

2009-03-12T00:37:00.014+08:00

I was daydreaming in my friend's car earlier today. Not much verbal exchanges between us, probably because we always see each other and can't think of a topic. But there were no silence in the vehicle, Jean Danker and the roar of the engine filled the air. I got bored eventually and looked at the traffic. Saw my dream car on the road and I keep cursing myself for not getting a better well paid job. While thinking about it, my eyes roam to the buildings ahead, before it fixed itself to the skies. It was clear, and cloudy (shit, i don't know how to describe it). I think it's been awhile since i admire the beauty of nature. It's been awhile since i looked up in the sky! Our modern city is surrounded by tall buildings and... tall buildings! Maybe that's why i didn't looked up that much. Somehow, my mind seemed relaxed when I looked at the clouds and the blue sky. Guess I was too occupied to observe nature all these while.

Last weekend was the Career & Education Fair at Suntec City Convention Centre (yes, more high rise buildings surrounding the area) and it sucked. The economy is indeed THAT bad. There was only a few companies that was offering jobs, and one of them was the Integrated Resort. Damn. The rest was filled with private schools! Singapore has just been rated the 10th most expensive city in the world, and to see employment on the decline is upsetting. Hopefully it will recover before 2009 ends, though I'm expecting it to end in mid 2010.

If it get worse, I'll find solace in the sky (it will not help actually, but worth a try :-P).

008: To Decide Whether To Shave My Beard Is More Difficult Than Trying To Decode "The Da Vinci Code"

2009-03-05T22:53:00.006+08:00

I have been keeping my beard since early January (I think). Some people say it looked nice, some say it makes me look old, etc. I need to decide. but I don't know which one makes me feel or look good. Anyway, I had a haircut just now, and I learned a very valuable lesson:

"Don't go for a haircut if you don't know what style you want."

Right now, i looked like a geek from the movie "_____________" (insert any nerd/geek theme movie you have ever watched). I should have sticked to my normal spike and messy style. But i was being 'creative', asking for a trim here, a trim there, and so on. But the hairdresser was partly to blamed. If he is a good hairdresser, he would know how to cut my hair without me looking funny. It's his fault!

I wanted to go to the usual salon that I patronized, but damn her! Why must she always close her salon so freaking early?! I never knew her name, but she's a great hairdresser. She would suggest, and clueless me would always agree. And it will turned out great.

Now I really have to do some experiment with my hair, using some wax or gel. If all else fail, I'll prepare myself to be laughed at tomorrow.

Oh, wait! I have a cap! God bless whoever invented the cap (should be dead already).

007: I'm Not Going Out Tonight Because It's Raining Heavily, But It Won't Stop My Money From Depleting

2009-02-28T22:11:00.005+08:00

I want to get a T-shirt by a band called The Dillinger Escape Plan. It's hard to get it in Singapore. So I'm going to order it via the Internet. I don't have to get out of my house to get it. I can just lie on my bed, click on a few buttons, and voila! I'll have it in a week or less.

Seriously, I have to cut down on my spendings. I need to use alot of money in April, and I can't keep spending like this. This March will be a bad month for me (financially). I need to buy some new clothing, so I could at least score on appearance if i get an interview to a new job. I can't be going to interviews with my Arch Enemy T-shirt and tattered denim. Not to mention that I need to clear the acne that have reappeared out of nowhere. Fuck, why can't it stop? I'm 24!!! I can't be going to the skin centre every 2 months and rely on Doxycycline, Tretinoin, Benzoyl Peroxide and lots of acne patch all my fuckin life!!!

Yes, I'm looking for a new job. I can't stick around with my current job anymore. No chance for me to progress, and given the current crisis, it's much harder. And the pay is shitty!! How am I going to own a car, a private apartment, and get married with that kind of salary? (Not that I want to get married soon, but need to plan ya know) Should have find a better job when the economy was good. The kind of job that I want now is different from what I'm doing, so will be very hard to nail it. Looking forward to the Career Fair in March. Wooooohooooo!!!

Anyway, I heard news that the Merlion's head has 'disappeared', due to lightning. I don't know whether it's true. The online news portal is not updated yet. Will check the papers tomorrow.

006: Creative LCD Screen is Much More Expensive Than My Handphone Touch Screen LCD

2009-02-23T01:52:00.002+08:00

Okay, the truth is, I don't know how much it will cost to repair my phone's LCD touch screen if it's spoilt. But $160 for an mp3 LCD screen? Ridiculous. I have submitted my displeasure to them online (and i'm not sure if i filled in the complaint in the correct form, their website is confusing), and I hope to get a reply soon.

Anyway, I'm having one of those shitty days again. Have you ever felt that you are always one step behind in almost everything? Like when you want to get that stupid limited edition shoes, someone beats you to the last piece. That kind of one step behind. It's happening again to me (no, it's not shoes).

Why must it always happen to me? Am i too slow? No, I don't think so. If I were to rush, I would be seen as desperate. Well, i may be. But not that desperate.

Some asked me to believe in fate. If you're fated to have something, you will get it. I do believe in it. And I believe I can change it too. If we really want it, we try to get it. If I'm not fated to be rich, I'll try to get rich. If i try really really hard, maybe I'll have my dreams come true.

God is not cruel. He will answer your prayers if you try hard enough. I'm sick of people blaming fate for the shitty life that they have. Maybe they need to lose their loved ones, their money, their house, etc. Then they will know what shitty really is.

Sometimes I do have doubts, and had my faith shaken a bit. Now is that time.

Think I need to sleep it off.

005: Audience of One by Rise Against

2009-02-20T03:42:00.003+08:00

Rise Against is in my list of artists who wrote beautiful and powerful lyrics. This one is from their latest album. I just can't resist putting it here.

------------------------------------------

I can still remember
The words and what they meant
As we etched them with our fingers
In years of wet cement
The days blurred into each other
Though everything seemed clear
We cruised along at half speed
But then we shifted gears

We ran like vampires from a thousand burning suns
But even then we should have stayed

But we ran away
Now all my friends are gone
Maybe we've outgrown all the things that we once loved
Runaway
But what are we running from?
A show of hands from those in this audience of one
Where have they gone?

Identities assume us
As nine and five add up
Synchronizing watches
To the seconds that we lost
I looked up and saw you
I know that you saw me
We froze but for a moment
In empathy

I brought down the sky for you but all you did was shrug
You gave my emptiness a name

We're all ok, until the day we're not
The surface shines, while the inside rots
We raced the sunset and we almost won
We slammed the brakes, but the wheels went on

004: Getting In a Car Crash Makes Me Fall In Love Again With Corrinne May

2009-02-18T00:11:00.004+08:00

Would you go crazy if your mp3 player gets run over by a car?

I'm going crazy right now. My beloved 2 months old Creative Zen X-Fi was ran over by some car. I dropped it in the middle of the road and don't realised it until I was halfway walking to the interchange. I panicked when I couldn't find my player, and traced back my steps.

I was relieved at first when I saw it on the road. But damn, the LCD screen cracked, and I can't see a thing. I can still listen to it though, and the only album that I am able to listen to right now is Safe In A Crazy World by Corrinne May (yes, I DO listen to Corrinne May, she's great).

*sigh* Now I need to find the time to send it to Creative for repairs. I know it won't be free. Accidents are not covered by warranty right? Or maybe I could tell them it suddenly cracked? :-P

I need some heavy, hardcore music on a busy day outside. Looks like I have to make do with Corrinne for now.

003: Ex-Con

2009-02-16T01:06:00.005+08:00

Something interesting happened just now. I was walking towards a supermarket when a man (probably in his thirties) approached me.

He: I'm sorry bang to bother you, i'd like to ask a favour.
Me: (Nodding)
He: Can i have a stick of cigarette? I'm so stressed out now.
Me: (Nodding and pulling out my pack of fags)
He: It's been a long day. I have just been released for three weeks now, and i just got a job as a car-washer through the interview earlier. My cousin (or maybe friend, i forgot) was supposed to....
Me: (Interrupts) Do you have a lighter? (Hold out my lighter)
He: No, thank you. (Continues) My cousin (or friend) was supposed to fetch me but he's still not here. I've been waiting for somebody to save my life. Could you spare me a dollar for my bus ride home?
Me: (Smilling and reach my pocket)
He: Thank you very much. It's so difficult... (Blah blah blah)
Me: (Smiled and left)

I didn't expect this from an ex-con. I was expecting some gung-ho talk (and I'd definately shove my lighter in his arse and light up). Okay, don't tell me those "Never judge a book by its cover" bullshit. We are always judging people, even though we are no angel ourselves. If he is really changing into a new leaf, then I hope God will be with him.

002: Lazy

2009-02-11T22:55:00.005+08:00

I'm being lazy right now. Tomorrow will be my exam, and i'm still in front of this screen typing this text. Keep telling myself, "in awhile".

That 'awhile' didn't come. Okay, I admit it. I'm a slave of procrastination. I insist on relaxing first before starting to stress out on that Advertising & Promotions notes. It is now laying comfortably inside my cupboard, telling me to let it sleep first before i start flipping its pages violently (which i usually do in order to find the desired page faster).

I'm not the only one though. I believe there are millions of others who are going to sit on something important and still not getting started on things that they are supposed to do. Maybe even YOU.

But why do we keep delaying ourselves? Why we choose Heaven first, when we know we will go to Hell later?

Because we are a bunch of rebellious creatures. And we love challenges. It is challenging to run through over a hundred pages of text and memorizing 10 chapters in less than 5 hours. Not forgetting the powerpoint slides and additional notes that we wrote while listening to the lecturer's explanation of this and that.

We also love the eye bags that we acquire the next morning. To show off to the others that we were, indeed, studying, only to realise that these people who you are trying to impress also have that ugly thing under their eyes.

For me, I love to see the surpise look on their faces when i got a better grade than them, considering they spend more hours and days than me and only get mediocre results. :-D

Okay Iqbal, stop bragging and start studying.

001: Comeback Kid

2009-02-09T00:20:00.005+08:00

Wooooohooooooo, I'm Back!!!

Back from where you may ask. Well, this is not my first blog. Probably my fourth.

But the first after 4 years (Yeah, that long).

Maybe some of you are wondering, "why bother?"

Well, i came across my old (and probably my first) blog. Can't believe my eyes when i saw it.

After many years, Blogspot still have not pull it down. Tried to log in but damn, forgot my password. And they sent my password to an email address which was already 'extinct' when i tried to retrieve it.

I had a good laugh, giggled and cover my face like a girl when i read it. It was created when i was 16. It was filled with high dosage of puberty and teenage angst.

I hope to laugh at myself again in another 5 years.

No, i'm not creating this page to follow the " trend" that kids follow nowadays.

I'm here to re-invent.

Reinvent myself.

Reinvent DaemonChylde...