100: Digital Footprint

By now, I believe everyone have read about the school principal who comments on his former female students' Facebook photos, racist remarks by some girls, and so on. These cases are proofs that the Internet is not a safe place. It never was. You'd expect that people will be more cautious when pressing the 'Enter' button on the keyboard when transmitting messages on social media networks. Seems like that's not the case.

Probably because nobody ever alerted them about their blog, FB, or Twitter posts. When nobody nudge you to make you aware of your mistakes, you'd assume that it's alright. Bring on those insensitive status updates, tweets, or blog posts. It's alright!

Then one day, WHAM!! Somebody decided to screenshot your contents and make it go viral in STOMP, Temasek Review, or any other websites that have high daily traffic. By then you'll realize that it's too late. Everybody knows your name, how you look like, where you work and stay, whether you're married, etc. You're embarrassed, and decided to shut down all social media accounts and create a new one (that gotta suck).

The thing is, you cannot hide anymore. You've left your digital footprints on the Internet. Everybody knows who you are. The 'news' about your behaviour, comments, or kinky photos are circulating everywhere. Your only hope is that nobody in your circle recognizes you (I do wonder, did their circle of friends find out about their newfound fame? What was their reaction?).

Kids, be careful with what you post online. The byte highway is never safe.

099: Parchment

Received my parchment and certificate today. I forgot how big the parchment is. Just look at my thumb and estimate the size. Anyhoots, I still can't believe that I've completed this degree. Planning on taking Masters next, but definately not anytime soon. Probably in another 3-4 years?

098: Lollipop Party

I'm pissed off. I've got a pair of free entry to a rooftop bar at Marina Bay Sands, and no one to tag along. Free entry and free drinks yo!

This is depressing. I need to have fun!

Haven't been to a club or bar for 6 months!!

I need a fucking life.

097: First of the Year

I checked the total number of entries I wrote last year.

Only six.

It's not because I'm lazy to post anything, but it seems that most of my entries were based on memories. I kept looking back at my younger years, and compare them with my current life. It's pathetic. It shows that I wasn't willing to let go.

Of course, you must not forget the past, but to keep remembering them is not healthy either. I probably need some kind of closure to totally let things go.

First, I need to get a job. Yes, even with a Bachelor's degree, it's hard to get employment. Okay, maybe difficult to find a career in a related field of study, but I didn't resigned from my previous job to do something I don't want to do.

Second, be successful in that chosen career. Means going up the ladder, be indispensable, and respected in the industry. My social circle would have been wider by then, and it will be easier to disregard any beef I have with my past.

Thirdly, avoid people from the past who are generally negative. In order to move on, you need all the positive energy that you can get. So I'm avoiding people who are negative, dumb, narrow minded, and so on.

Fourthly, I need to write three books, or three short stories at least. They will be based on my journey from my teenage years. I've already decided on the titles, but haven't plan on when to start writing, lol!!

And (totally unrelated to the whole closure thing) last, but not least, I need another holiday (after a couple years of employment at least). Missing London, but my next trip will be Rome or Paris. Though planning on Phuket in the near future. But I don't foresee any trips this year. This is the year that I need to set my life straight, and I hope I will find what I'm looking for soon. Real soon, because I'm getting desperate each day.

Really desperate.

096: My Top 10 Albums For 2011

Picking only 10 albums sucks, because there are too many great albums out there. It's tough, but I manage to choose 10 that I really dig. Here goes:

10

LMFAO - Sorry For Party Rocking

9

Yellowcard - When You're Through Thinking, Say Yes

8

The Get Up Kids - There Are Rules

7

Protest The Hero - Scurrilous

6

Rise Against - Endgame

5

Florence and the Machine - Ceremonials

4

Mastodon - The Hunter

3

Times of Grace - The Hymn of a Broken Man

2

Death Cab for Cutie - Codes and Keys

1

August Burns Red - Leveler

The following are worth mentioning:

Arch Enemy - Khaos Legions

Mogwai - Hardcore Will Never Die, But You Will

Funeral for a Friend - Welcome Home Armageddon

095: Not Just Another Day

It was a wonderful day, cooling and windy, but nonetheless, wonderful, without any hint of rain. You and yours friends or loved ones were spending some precious moment together. It was great to finally get some free time to relax after countless days of keeping up with schedule, running around to meet deadline, and all those boring stuff you did at work.

You were probably hanging out with your friends at a cafe, having a sip of coffee and savoring those sinful but divine cheesecake that was topped with some chocolate sauce and a half-sliced piece of strawberry. When the cake entered your mouth and landed on the tip of your tongue, you thought, "ooohhh, this is life". Great ambience, awesome friends, mouthwatering desserts, what else can you ask for?

The day was going great for awhile, but something was diverting your attention. At the far corner of your eye, you noticed a van. You turned to take a glimpse at it, because it was hauntingly beautiful. A van with transparent glasses, where you can see the content of the vehicle. Flowers were arranged around a big box, and you thought it belongs to a florist. Then you realized that the box was actually... a coffin.

That's when you were reminded that life is short. Too short that it will not even last a hundred years (unless you're one of those few lucky (or cursed) ones). You were reminded repeatedly about your mortality. Some days you just shrugged it off, and some days you reflect on your life. Today is not the day that you just sweep it under the rug. "What have I done so far in my life? Is this what I want? Have I achieved my dreams? Will I be remembered when I die?". Probably others will ask, "What will happen to my Facebook account? Will they post condolences on my wall? Who will manage my account to add old friends that I did not manage to accept? Will my blog be a relic for people to remember me by?".

This is cliche, but you never know when you will die. You wondered if you have fulfilled your dreams and responsibilities. Will it even matter? You're dead, and you only need to worry about what happen after your death. Will you become a ghost? Will you be facing God? Will you be in heaven or hell? Will your soul be transferred to another universe or dimension? Will you even realize that you're dead?

But do we even want to mull over it? It does gives me the chills. I don't want to die. I want to be immortal and still look like I'm 21. Wistful thinking, but I hope it will happen. If I'm still going to die, at least create the cure to growing older, please?

094: No Revolution

It's kind of overdue to write about this now, and I have so many things to say. But I'll make it short.

I was, and still, frustrated with the General Elections results. What the hell man? Why are you people afraid to vote for another? Why do you still believe that your vote is not secret? Why listen to hearsay? Those pakcik/apek/mamak from coffeeshop got PhD is it? Why so fucking stupid?! I believe the people who voted for the ruling party were old retarded fucks. Of course they don't care, they are going to die soon!

2016? No hope lah. You people are fucked already. Not the kind of fuck that you guys get from your spouse/gf/bf, etc, but the kind of fuck that you get from foreign trash that raped you from the back (read: assfuck).

I really need to get out of this forsaken country...

Note: No offence to my foreign friends. If you're in my list, then you're good. :-D

093: London Calling

So here I am in London... It's almost 9 A.M. here, and I need to shower. It was cold last night when I arrived. Let's see if it's that cold during the day.

092: WTF Blogger / Multiply??!!

This is definately stupid. You see, I linked up my Blogspot and Multiply together, so that everytime I post something in Blogger, Multiply will import it. It worked well so far, no complaints. But I did not expect it to import posts from my 2nd blog too!

What was the 2nd blog for? Let me explain. I had an assignment, and I must create a blog for it. I gotta write over the course of a few weeks, before submitting the link to my lecturer. It's all done now. But today, I logged in to Multiply (hell, I have not been logging in for a long time!) And suddenly, I saw all the post for that blog in my Multiply page! Oh, the horror!!! I'm never going to use my personal account for assignments again!

Anyway, I have not been blogging for months! I have nothing to share now, because I'm drained. It's been tiring, I need a holiday..

Wait, I AM going for a holiday in two weeks! Woohoooo!!!!!

091: Another New Beginning

2010 was a great year. Well, it may not be all smooth sailing, but it was an enriching year.

Earlier this year (or should I say last year), I was optimistic about what the year will bring me. I was close with a woman whom I fell for, spent most of the time together, stayed over her place and have quality time with her. We kinda shared many things in common.

Two weeks after my birthday, she decided to severe all ties, and I was lost. I was kind of depressed, and kept thinking about how to amend things. But it was really the end, and there was nothing I could do to prevent it.

Every dark clouds have a silver lining though. A couple of month after that, I was offered a new job. If she was still around, I would not have survived in this new company. You see, when you start on a new job, you need full concentration and no distraction. She used to call me every few hours, and that would have distracted me. So I left the company that I have been with for three years, where I did not received any salary increment or bonus. It was stupidity on my part for staying that long.

The new job was not merciful. It was chaotic, messy, and.. stressful? But I liked it. All my previous jobs were too easy for me, to the extend of insulting my intelligence. I have more responsibilities in that new job. The slightest mistake will cause the whole office to panic and start thinking of ways to resolve the issues. We ended up doing overtime, and getting back home late. Not helping either when you were preparing for your graduation project. I did finish my project though, and when the day for the presentation came, I was prepared. I even got an ‘A’ for it. It’s either I was lucky, or I’m really that damn smart.

Despite the piling workload, I was still prepared to further my education. A few months after getting my results, I registered for a Bachelor’s degree. Who would have thought that I would be doing a degree? I shouldn’t be gloating though. I’m just in the second term now, and there are still so much to do. Not forgetting that I have four assignments due soon, and I have yet to get started.

Back to the new job. It was good. Better salary. I even received a bonus! I’m still finding another job though. I need to do something I like. I studied mass communications for a reason. I want a job related to my field of study. I have to believe that I can get it this year.

2010 have been good to me. I need to believe that 2011 will be much better. Need. I will dispel any negativity and believe. Faith is all I have now.

These are the two words that I need to hold on to: Faith and Believe.

090: The progress so far...

I have just finished my first term for my Bachelor. The assignments were mind-blowing. You see, for two of the assignments, I have to read some articles and make some references to Aristotle, and his three rhetorical approach to convince and persuade people. The articles given were interesting, something that I would definately read. But to analyze and write a critique on it? Woah...

I failed miserably. I'm not referring to the grades. I passed five of the six assignments (I'm still waiting for the result of the last assignment to be released) mind you. I got one Distinction and four Credits, which sucks actually, because I should have worked harder and get all distinction for the assignments. But you know me, always waiting till deadlines to start on those assignments. I cannot believe that I'm still fooling around even at degree level.

Now back to my failure. For one of the assignments, I decided to work on a piece of article regarding former U.S President Bush. It was quite a long piece, with two A4 size pages of text with fonts of 10. I spent a week analyzing that article, but still couldn't grasp the whole purpose of the writer for that article. I gave up eventually, and focussed on an article by a prisoner of war who uses emotional appeals and abstraction to persuade the audience to disagree with an agreement between his country and Japan (due to the WWII apocalypse). It was easier, but I only received a Credit for it! Humph!!

There's a couple of other failures as well, but let's not elaborate further. For now, I'll just wait for the last assignment's result and be prepared for the start of a new term this Friday.

P/S: Have you seen my new hair? :-P

089: *blank*

I was reading through my previous entries in this blog (not the old one). And I find the older entries interesting (self-praising mode activated). Now, I don't know how to construct an interesting entry.

What is wrong with me?!

Dear creativity, please hit me...

088: A Different Direction

I'm not sure if I have made the right decision, but hell, I've made it, and I need to make the best of it. I scrapped the plan to continue with my Advance Dip. I left that school (half-heartedly), to start on a new journey.

I'll be taking my Bachelor of Arts instead! You have to admit, Adv Dip is bullshit. I don't understand why a university whose ranking is not that great have strict requirements. I am enrolled in a much better Uni now (and definately harder), so it's time to buck up and stop fooling around (okay, I won't stop, but let's not make that often).

Orientation last Tuesday was rather... entertaining. Let's see if there is more entertainment to come (I doubt so, but let's just hope). My only gripe is that the CD-Rom that was given by the Uni won't work with my awesome Macbook Pro!!! Argghhh!!!!

Maybe it's time to install Windows on my Mac. I'll just allocate a small space for it (1 GB can?).

Looks like I'll be friends again with Windows (just friends, coz I'm married to Mac).

If only they have a Mac Edition for me...

087: A Stranger In An Island

I no longer feel at home. The faith I had diminishes with each passing day. There is no pride in being here. I am constantly being stepped upon by people who are supposed to be the strangers.

We are no longer the pride of the establishment. Just take a look at our surroundings. The filthy rich and the pathetically poor, establishmentarian vs. disestablishmentarian, the blind patriotic vs. the 'anarchist', heavy censorship vs. free speech, and the list goes on and on. The former are triumphant, no matter how big their size are. We are blinded by the propaganda machines that present itself in the form of media.

People demand change. No, there will be no change. We are comfortable with the current situation. We know the truth, but prefer lies. Lies are simple. Simple is bliss. We admit defeat, and live in decline. Change is farfetched. I know it. You know it. We know it.

There will be no change. Stop hoping. Stop believing. It's time to leave. I desperately need to leave. They remove the 'pro' in progress and add an 'ag' and an 'ion' in it.

I want to leave.. Any kind soul willing to spare me $300,000? No, I won't pay back. :-D

086: Goodbye (This time, it's for good)

Dear Windows,

I know it's hard for you to accept the fact that you're no longer good enough for me. How can I be happy with crashes, viruses, and 1000 more things that you cannot stay away from? We have been together for more than 10 years. Fuck, I've spent half of my life with you!!!

This time, I'm really leaving you. Sure, you tried to make it up by releasing Windows 7. But you can never satisfy my lust for speed, efficiency, and 1000 other things that you can't provide for.

I'll never forget about you though. How can I? I go to work everyday, and I have to face YOU!!! We may not be in a relationship anymore, but we are still colleagues. And you will be one of those people that I hate at work (you just freezes on me earlier today at work, and I have not fucking saved my documents!).

I'll never forget the times we had together though. We have gone through thick and thin together. From those enormous floppy disk to the smaller ones (now, they are extinct). CD writer to USB memory sticks. Windows - Windows 95 - Windows 98 - Windows ME: Millennium Edition (call it Mistake Edition) - Windows XP - Windows Vista - and now, Windows 7. And of course, our journey to more than a million websites over the years.

Let's not reminisce over these bitter sweet memories. It's over now. I've found more than just viruses, slow loading, and crashes. She is definately much more better than you, and she will be mine forever (or maybe until something better comes out. Hey, I'm a guy! Deal with it!).

Goodbye. I'll miss you... NOT!

Yours sincerely,
Iqbal 'DaemonChylde' Mohamed

085: Moving On

Confessing the bad things I have done, I am not doing it for you. But for me. Only me. My reflections. So, no, your forgiveness you said you won't ever give is not required

I'm learning to let go, even though your shadow is still lingering. I'm still wondering whether you were my sweetest dream, or my nightmare.

If we meet again, I hope we have already achieve our dreams. The dreams that we have revealed when we spend hours daily on the telephone. The dreams that we discussed every time we met. The dreams that we shared when we slept together. Dreams that were not built on sand.

We may meet again.. But will it be for good? Or are we destined to stay apart? Will reconciliation benefit the both of us? Or will it destroy the dreams that we have built?

Will we ever find out?

084: Iqbal - Part II

I can still tolerate Eee-bhan or Eee-bhal. But not Eeem-mwaa, Imran (wtf?), Akba, Iqmal (if you can pronounce this, then I don't understand how you can't pronounce 'Iqbal'), Eee-ma, and Shiva (yes!! I'm not kidding!! I've become a Hindu god!)

Children, let me teach you how to pronounce 'Iqbal' slowly...

Eeeeeeekkkk....... bhaaaaaalllll......

083: The Singapore Dream

Most of us are definately chasing after those 5 Cs: Cash, Car, Condominium, Credit Cards, and Country Clubs. I am one of them. So far, it's two down, two to go (I'm not into country clubs). But I don't think I will ever be contented with what I have. I wouldn't be happy with a million bucks, a Mitsubishi Evo, and a condo at Bedok Reservoir. Any Dick, Joe, or Harry can afford that! I want more.

A few hundred millions or billions, with a Lamborghini, and a mansion (or maybe a penthouse will do) in the heart of the city. And of course, some power.

That's what I call a dream, and I am willing to sell my soul for them.

I will. I swear.

082: Weird

How weird can someone or something be?

Just when I thought I have seen everything...

081: Cigarettes & Red Bull - The Final War (For This Certification)

Nope, not really the end. I still want to continue with a higher certification. But with a new job that might 'stop' me from continuing, there might be a.... Wait, what the fuck? No no no!! I won't let this happen. I will work for a few months, and then try to negotiate with the person in charge. Lessons are twice a week, so I believe they can accommodate the schedule. Can't be doing overtime every day right?

Anyway, this coming exams will be a heavy one. I really mean it. HEAVY! The dynamic of Mass Communications will be tough to handle. But there is something else. A topic that I need to digest for this Tuesday exam.

Religion.

I have to write about one probably. And I don't know which one to choose. I'm contemplating between (in alphabetical order) Christianity, Hinduism, and Islam (I don't know anything about Buddhism, sorry).

Christianity: The bible, history & culture, philosophy, Trinity.
Hinduism: The 2 epic books (Mahabharata & Ramayana), the different Gods, history & culture.
Islam: The Qur'an, Hadith Nabi, Tasawuf.

*sigh* Religions are hard to fathom. Since I really can't decide, then there is only one thing left to do...

*eeny meeny miney mo...*